The most journal I wrote called the unwanted artist absolutely has felt as such regarding all sorts of aspects as I had written about when I was on my Medal of Honor Art Project trip in 2015 after I had returned from that year's trip to the rental house from that particular trip, has fully sunken in as to how unwanted I truly have been more-so than what I had initially felt simply from such a time which in retrospect; I had already felt as such only because of not knowing or understanding as to how I had wound up in Washington state and even though by such a time I had begun my Medal of Honor Art Project, written as many books as I had, written as many journal blogs as I had, painted what I had, and gone as far as I had to actually help where I could. Yet the ways of which to ever feel as though anyone actually cared has not been paid attention to as to how such could ever make that sort of feeling for me, personally. I am not as verbal in #Washington state because of the zapping/electrical aspects, as some may have thought as per the ways attempting to speak the correct way for the way to communicate at all about the pain levels to what what occurring and I did not want or need to as I had refused the experiment and research that was asked about in the #BestBuy when at #GeekSquad by the male who had said that Geek Squad and Best Buy were not going to allow the insurance program for the accidental warranty because of having gone through 13 laptops because of the problems with technology I have had since waking up from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury; however he was interested to see what energy does in reference to technology, which I refused fully as per not feeling comfortable in the slightest with such in any such way at all. This situation where I have actually had to be forced against my will to write about any such problems literally has gone against what I had said, as well as all of the warnings from the electrical items at that Best Buy in Clackamas #Oregon at the time, as all of the electronic warning devices all went off as an alarm at the time; however that obviously seems to have been ignored needlessly because of how such situations have gone on at this point, regarding the lack of respect to my needs, wants, and/or desires as such situations to get what I need taken care of have yet to be accomplished for what I need personally as I did not want or need to ever go into such details and the lack of any requirement to go into such has not been anything I have ever wanted to go into on my choice despite the lack of others taking "no" for an answer and thus any who have not taken no for an answer as to what is involved regarding myself personally is a violation of my rights. What does that matter, though? To me, that matters a lot more than it seems to have mattered to others as I have seen.
However since what I actually have needed because of the levels of pain constantly in at such times including now which the pain levels are far different now than they were then, because of the additional situations regarding the after effects not only from being in Washington state though on top of the after effects from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury. When writing such during the time of 2015 of the unwanted artist which truly feels as such because of how so many aspects have gone and adding a few edits in 2019 because of needing to add such portions for such a journal, I suppose the requirement for such clarifications could not be done regarding such in that particular journal entry that would simply have made a bit more sense though of course the additional amount of words probably was not considered as good enough for any aspect; though also seeing the levels of which according to the web-count aspects as to the lack of interest in anything I have done just as similarly to the ways online previously to moving back to San Antonio in 2012. Even before in the area of Irving as well as Cedar Park the same sorts of lower number levels had been regarding such posts and the lack of any such support as seen through others' accounts online from their posts and lack of responses to my posts, to which then the pondering as to when in Washington state and all such had hit during that particular aspect of reflecting upon anything which was ever considered as worthwhile as to what I actually had ever accomplished which was ever helpful or worthwhile for myself to see where I have ever done anything worth the time I had put into such aspects; which honestly is a continued aspect as to what has only been perpetuated because of other aspects regarding quite a few reasons as to feeling the ways I have been feeling, regarding all such aspects of such feelings as an unwanted artist as per the requirements needed to actually create the artwork of the types I create personally. I have yet to ever feel as a wanted artist or even wanted in a positive way, to be honest and quite frankly has been only viewed as not wanting and not needing any artwork I create or can create because of what needs I personally have to create such artwork because if it was that my artwork was wanted then the responses would have been as per what I need to create such artwork. I did not return to Texas to create such artwork other than to pick up the historical and spiritual rubbings from the markers in the state of Texas to then create the artwork for such pieces, though such pieces have to be completed a specific way and such times as since January 2021 has only begun the repetition as to what I had felt regarding being the unwanted artist because of the lack seeing such requirements being met just for that particular art project while not forgetting my other types of painting and creation as per both in reference to asking if I could paint some of the walls for a room in Club Sapphire as well as the regards of the portions regarding the other types of paintings I create such as the prophetic portions of painting which only occur in certain ways because of the required necessary locations for such a set of pieces of artwork as my paintings. The lack of contact regarding such to actually get to where I know I need to be for the creation of such paintings for such only has been perpetuated by the problems which others have caused to be able to get to such a location to be able to actually get such paintings completed as they will not be created in the state of Texas, as per what is required for such paintings as well as my Medal of Honor Art Project to which only perpetuates such a feeling as to the unwanted artist portions of such.
Going against what I personally need for the requirements of creating such paintings repeats such as the way I had already felt, because if there are those who actually know how such works are created means the levels of certain specifics are mandatory for such pieces to be created as I had not created such before when in the state of #Texas from any point in a rental apartment or a rental house because of the specific energetic portions; however a rental apartment or rental house in Washington state because of certain similarities to my house in San Antonio, my house in Carrollton, as well as my art class with Ms. Dotty meaning the plants and flora of the area with the combination of the ocean being nearby for the New Jersey and Washington state areas; whereas the houses I personally chose in comparison to any ever being chosen for me would not be ever considered as an available option, because of having to be the only one who chooses such a location as it has to and must be by my choice and by my choice alone. If not a choice of my own, then the perpetuation of such a situation to not be able to create such paintings of such types unless that is the preference and the lack of any type of art and artwork is preferred which then has been a problem regarding my Constitutional Rights to my Freedom of Expression as well as my Freedom of Religion. Thus once again, the repetition of the unwanted artist regarding any and all art I create which also includes the writings of the books I have created regarding such portions of the fictional series of books by the way; though since such royalties of such books have not been seen regarding such books to only see the downloads on other websites which I did not approve of, only shows me the lack of any who would actually want such to be continued regarding such works of each type which only I create.
The explanations within the FSL books alone I simply thought would have been considered as good enough to see and read that I am not the typical person who views the world the same way as others nor has had the exact same experiences combined, by all such aspects as to how many times of being told as well as shown where the most I had given and done to assist was looked at as nothing more than what just had been expected by others anyway while the actual aspects of how I could ever be looked at in a positive way has truly only continued onward from such a time. I have sent such all sorts of ways thinking maybe there would be something worthwhile to what I had put together and while then noticing how different news organizations started reporting on what I knew others had experienced as well started appearing within the news casts, I wondered many questions as to why it had not been noticed before as I knew I had written about such portions and had pointed such out to those who I had been in direct contact with regarding speaking with on a daily basis at the time. The two spoke with me about such briefly to then go along as I simply returned to the room I was kept in compared to ever having such pointed out as to the fact I points of the writings, which I had seen when completed and the rolling of the eyes as to anything pointed out as to such connections to what I had written about. What does that sort of aspect have in a response to look at and review regarding what I had written about and pointed to, when you take an honest look at such? While it is not something which was thought to ever be considered admittedly as to any such paying attention to the portions as to what would be considered as a simple acknowledgement of just as it had been regarding through years prior as I had discussed other portions in person before regarding various aspects of such, the same sort of responses of such rolling of the eyes or telling me of what is or is not to pay attention to or other such portions of which the inability for me to see where in ways which made sense to me as to what was the point of because of knowing and yet just being pushed to the side for such a knowledge aspect. In turn the no answers only perpetuated such views as to the lack of anyone ever actually wanting such artwork from me, and the lack of those who have ever found anything worthwhile about anything I have created and can create in my opinion. I would not have gone around and around in such writings regarding my journal blog since February 2021, if such had been fully ready to go with where I need to go in comparison to what has been occurring and has been occurring needlessly if there actually has been any want or need for such from me as per what my personal needs are for what I create as per my feelings as to how such has gone. I have seen where before then as well as since as to what more have done in comparison to myself which I have always been happy for, and yet as standing to the side while watching as others passed over and walked on by as though there was the simple nodding in other public-ish locations as though it was merely just a game to simply speak with me in comparison which only lead to such thoughts of speaking at me in comparison to how I had spoken with; which yes, there is a difference.
In such ways of feeling as an or the unwanted artist because of the inability regarding my own short comings as to the after effects which were pointed out so frequently at such times prior to winding up in Washington state while dealing with all of the zapping I was dealing with at such times through to later including now because of such aspects, the portions of which simply being informed as to what actually had been something I had done that was ever considered as worthwhile to what I had done in which while knowing, I have done a bit of a few things and not in the normal ways as to what I have seen only later afterwards as anything different.
Was it that everything I had done and everything I created was just to a different level that it was not and is not considered as something that was ever worth simply bringing up my name, for such realities and art I create(d)? The ways as to what has occurred has only perpetuated such because I am not a performer regarding the ways which is in the ways of other artists to which then the requirements of such art is not anywhere close to such of ever being in the ways which a singer or band individual or public speaker or any such portions of that type of performance, because of my artwork not being a performance despite what others' opinions might be due to the misconception I repeatedly explained when I was in Texas doing the modeling as well as only 3 dance performances and 1 performance with only 2 lines of words to actually speak because of not feeling comfortable for such situations. As the only dance performances which I had to work to force myself to ever ask to be able to do as well as the one performance which I had thought was only going to be modeling for the poster and only after a few months I had been told there was a mandatory performance with only 2 lines because of the knowledge of the after effects of my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury, were literally me forcing myself as per what I saw I personally needed for myself to get over certain aspects I had noticed for myself. Yet the misconception by anyone and everyone who would have thought otherwise despite having explained in person as well as in writing in FSL, that was only for my ability to get to know what I look as regarding modeling and only regarding getting over my fears of being in front of a crowd regarding those performances regarding the 3 dances and 1 speaking performance. In regards of such to ever be forced against my will and against what I prefer does not show the aspects of being wanted to me, as it shows me the lack of respect as to what I personally explained I needed for myself. It does not show me the care of such requirements as to what it takes for me to feel comfortable for such, it only shows me the lack of concern for what I know I need for myself and does not show me of any want for my works as per my creations for the artwork I create. It also only shows me how none prefer how I create any outfits, as per not going on what I personally require for myself to feel comfortable to ever step forward in the ways which I personally feel comfortable. What it shows me is others have preferred the lack thereof and have only shown the lack of any want of any of my creations, because of the lack of getting what I personally need for any such types of creations I make which in turn the only aspects to which I can see is how I write. Thus if there have supposedly been those who could have wanted such art, it does not show me that you want or need such work of mine as per the ways I am not as what others consider as a normal artist.
For example with my first dance performance, I literally ran off of the stage when the host of the show got onto the stage with the microphone to then what I thought was to announce the next performance group because no one had told me of any requirement for me to speak before the evening of that performance. The male who I had as a submissive did not tell me of anything I needed to do regarding any portions of what was required, as I was the one who had contacted Steve and asked for the information and was only told the dance performance was needed for that event. Thus when I was done with that performance, I walked off of the stage because of how such had been explained to me as well as the electrical aspects regarding all such portions regarding that performance as well as the ways others had treated me regarding the prior portions referencing the other females involved with the exception of the main attraction to that event who I had spoken with in the green room openly because of it being a private discussion and a personal connection regarding the discussions she and I had. Other than that, I had not had many who were a part of the show for that event who spoke with me regarding any such aspects. The next example for the 2 dance performances in Dallas were similar regarding how I had contacted them myself asking of such, and when going to the location for that event the submissive male who was supposed to inform me of what was required when arriving had not ever informed me of anything and I had to find the females in charge to get any information because of the lack of responses when I had arrived. The last performance had the same aspects which I contacted asking about such for only the poster portion, only to later be informed there was a performance associated with being the poster girl which I actually had attempted to walk away from though since there was no one else who he said was going to be ready in such time was the only reason I had ever agreed to complete such because of having appreciated the ability to attend such events as well as what I felt at the time; however that was going to be the last performance I would allow myself to do, simply because of the lack of information I personally needed for such to feel comfortable myself as per what was known was occurring in my life at such times in 2011. The male submissive I was dating in comparison to the prior times of my performances similarly did not have any such interactions which were helpful to me at the time, which meant he knew nothing as to the way the actual event had gone as well as to how such a performance had been as he only walked in during the last section of the performance which had the longest portion of the second line that I had to speak regarding that performance; which would then have him assuming that there were more lines I had, then the 2 words for the prior lines I had for that performance, though such an unappreciated and unwanted feelings had initially begun to set in, regarding such a lack of in person aspects. The fact of the lack of in person discussions had been the problem from the beginning, and has only been a continued problem since then; however the portions regarding furthered aspects as to the other portions regarding what was going on in my personal life, only perpetuated such feelings as has gone onward since then to the portions of writing the unwanted artist journal as per the lack of paying attention to what I actually personally need for my creativity to flow as needed for such types of works.
Thus in reference to my modeling, dance performances, artwork, books, and my Medal of Honor Art Project all have gone as the ways which they have gone and the portions of the unwanted artist feelings have only been perpetuated because of the knowledge of myself to how I actually am regarding such creations simply not being paid attention to regarding to what I personally require for such aspects. The most amount of such feelings as an unwanted artist literally has been perpetuated the most by the times and such regarding the state of Texas' individuals because of the lack of paying attention by all such involved, as to what I personally actually need. I do not request much because I do not need as much as others require, I only need what I need and such needs have not been met for such creations; thus such regarding all such works I have created only perpetuates such, because of the non-following of what I actually require for such art creations. While some might assume they would have known what I needed and some might actually be in reference to those two males, there was not anything either of those two males had paid attention to what I needed at such performances and thus the lack of understanding how either could or would ever be able to give any advice in ways which would be considered as helpful to me would be easily seen if either had anything to do with or has anything to do with the length of time it has taken to be able to actually get to creating my artwork. If there are those who actually want such, then the lack of responses or the no answers I painted as prophecy are showing such fully as the way I actually have needed such is the starting point as to what the problems are and have been. Thus such individuals would be the problem as to why such art and artwork has not been able to be completed as needed, and such aspects continued by any who would have thought to only read such thinking that I am the way any others would be regarding such while not taking anything I personally require for such to be created which then only perpetuates the unwanted artist portions needlessly if there are actually those who actually want such artwork.
In such those who knew me prior such as in #SCUBA Diving would have absolutely no clue or idea as to who I am as per the choices made by such individuals previously about my #SCUBADiving and having not paid attention to what I had already explained to them, and my biological parents knew nothing as to how I work to create anything, which means none have ever paid attention to what I have actually needed for anything in the slightest beyond what ideas and assumptions have been regarding such portions and aspects. I am not the normal type of artists, author, performer, or SCUBA Diver if that has not been figured out by now; which means if I contact you about something as I have contacted multiple individuals, would mean if you actually knew what the portion of the no answers part had been, it had to do with the fact I had not ever received answers regarding the situations involving my daughter and my son because of the portions of how such situations had gone in comparison to what has been going on though is ironic such has been within the state of Texas yet again needlessly regarding such no answers. A self-fulfilling prophecy for those involved regarding the state of Texas can be seen not only back in those times regarding 2008-2013 regarding McCoy Elementary School and #CFBISD in Carrollton Texas which none of those people ever knew me and all such individuals had treated my daughter and my son and I as they had, though also regarding since my return to the state of Texas regarding all such contacts in reference to reaching out for what I had actually needed in comparison to just hanging out as those portions of just hanging out were gone before I returned to the state of Texas as per what my needs were when I had returned to the state of Texas; as there was not the requirement in my thoughts at any point for such paintings artwork, and only such regarding picking up the historical and spiritual rubbings for my Medal of Honor Art Project with the books I wrote regarding "The Modern Day Book By: Reverend Susan MeeLing" as I added the portion as I have been an Ordained Reverend since 2004, as well as the three volume book series written correctly for the way my classes would go if I were to be in the location I have put in for the transfer to, because of the requirements thereof to teach such information for such portions regarding such correctly for the safety of such who might ever have been interested in such teaching from me for such types of smaller levels of SCUBA Diving regarding my personal style as well as the requirements for my creation of the Underwater Travel System. However such prolonging needlessly as to getting to the location I have had signs for anyone and everyone who could have simply paid attention to such, for years before I ever returned to the state of Texas and yet both were completed in the state of Texas before I wound up in Washington state as well as after I returned form Washington state being the only two tattoos in my palms which were redone for a brighter look to simply pay attention to regarding what I personally needed to remember for myself as well as if others actually paid attention to prophecy, would actually get done and taken care of correctly. Do not assume when I contact you I am unsure of what I need, it is actually the other way around as it is you who cannot assume what I need as I will tell you what I need once you respond in comparison to anything else as per such the ways to which I am.
That sort of assumption only perpetuates the unwanted artist aspects as per prior situations repeatedly able to be seen in prior times, in comparison to actually ever making me feel as a wanted artist because of the energetic portions thereof despite what prior situations only partially paid attention to have been able to show by others in comparison to knowing and understanding and comprehending myself. As such prior times of modeling, performances, books, and art paintings not having gone the way I had personally intended as well as needed for such to ever feel as a wanted artist for what I create has been problematic as per the ways I pick up on energy. There is no one who has actually been able to know how such I do is created, and that portion of which as to what is needed still has yet to be paid attention to as anyone who would ever think that can be forced by others is sadly mistaken regarding all such aspects; as I literally have explained where I could as to what I personally needed, and none paying attention to my actual needs while thinking they knew better when they knew nothing at all and had not ever done what was needed at such times as to actually take care of what I personally needed for such aspects. None I ever dated had ever seen what was required, which in turn none actually knew anything about what was needed when I even had told them specifically what I needed as their own egos were more important to them in comparison to what was needed for myself as the one and only who was doing as I had as each portions of each performance is of my creation fully regarding the music/outfits/makeup/entrance/exits for the three dances I had created and I performed. I have later heard of how other performers and artists have had managers to actually help them when signing a contract for an agent, which I have not ever done and had not ever been asked for such a contract to which since such has not ever been accomplished such all works have only been on my own. I do not have an agent, I do not have a manager, I do not have anyone else to go through except to go through me directly as per through my website through the message area as I have pointed out where I could on my website for any who would ever be interested; which since such has not occurred regarding such to ask what I would need, hence the situations regarding since then. I have made the requests for such known to who is supposed to actually take care of such portions on the other side of the equations, and yet the lack of proper response to actually get done what I personally require for such portions has not been paid attention to as to what I personally require for as such art and artwork pieces to which then the perpetuation of the feelings regarding the unwanted artist portions in a more full context.
The lack of comfort as required for such art and artwork having been ignored this whole time, again perpetuates what is needed for such pieces of work that I personally require to be able to direct and produce the art and artwork I create from what I make for furthered portions thereof. I know what I need and have made such requests each time I know what is needed to be taken care of for myself to create such, and yet the no answers since such has only been another proof to me as to the way I feel and see as such regarding my personal requirements for such creations. I did not discuss such portions about the unwanted artist with anyone in person at such times by the way, because of the lack of ability to actually feel comfortable enough to communicate to who had been outside of the door in the area of Washington state to the room I was kept in after I had begun my art and my artwork to begin with as I was not creating my artwork or at initially in that room I was creating such in the area where I had felt the most amount of ease regarding being able to see who and what I needed for such to be created in comparison to what others possibly assumed as the room I was kept in was only after seeing what I had created and such scaring him to the point of not wanting or needing to see me unless it was under a lock and key situation which in turn meant none of the paintings art was created after I was locked into such a room as it was created mainly before I was kept in that room after I was cornered at the Cowboys Dance Hall Stoney LaRue concert and was the only way to express such situations I was feeling at such times. Do not let the color choices fool you as just because of the colors being bright, did not mean the colors reflected the internal feelings as the names of the art from the works I created were what was supposed to be paid attention to. Take a hint regarding my name I created for myself as a Female Dominant, regarding the name Lady Dori Belle for such a reference as to how such paintings would be actually viewed by me regarding my creations in comparison to what had repeatedly and wrongly been assumed by those I knew at such times; as I explained to people back in 2009-2012 in person regarding the portions of such a name in comparison to the assumptions possibly made; as the only name which has been accurate regarding the naming process reflecting who I am internally is my author/artist/healer/Ordained Reverend/person as I am with the name meaning regarding Susan MeeLing; to which Susan means pale face/innocent and MeeLing means innocent flower/Lotus Blossom. Anyone who could not pay attention to such before, can you see such now from such meanings? The name I created Lady Dori Belle has the explanations I had put forward regarding such a choice for myself which had and has encompassed the other portions to add to such aspects of my original name from my Bok Pu and my Bok Gung regarding the whole name they with my maternal adopted Grandpa Gavett had chosen for me, in comparison to what may have been assumed by others; though how accurate in reference to both aspects as to both names and such choices thereof.
Where my names have meant something and always have as per how I was named as well as why I was named as I had such names given to me by what my Bok Pu, Bok Gung, and Grandpa Gavett named me; this is how such had occurred regarding as to how my biologicals had chosen to pick such names, only for me. My Grandpa Gavett had met a female named Susan in his youth who was a next door neighbor at one point in time which he had fallen in love with as a child and saw how she had been regarding her views on life, which took him to think about other aspects when she had disappeared because of a situation at the time. He kept her in his thoughts for years and decades which got him involved with the Armed Forces of the United States of America #USA looking for her to try to find a way to find her, and the development of the various groups and organizations became what they had begun as to assist such endeavors knowing he was not the only one who was searching for someone that was needed in life as to the aspects of what she had taught him regarding other aspects regarding religion and spirituality. She was the most pure and most innocent he had ever seen and had remained as such in every individual aspect thereof, which he did find her later on though was unable to bring himself to speak with her because of who she was around at such times. He chose to step back instead of stepping forward towards her to speak with her, knowing he needed to and chose not to; and he had hoped if there ever was a chance for any such for others to take the opportunity to actually step forward without the hesitations he had reserved, he did not want such for others as he had felt within for multiple years and decades afterwards. When he found out some of what she had gone through during such times while working with the different groups, he began forming groups and other organizations to take care of and handle such situations because of how infuriated he was to find out what she had been through; and such situations regarding getting others out of such situations, became his priority while doing what he could where he could because of the multitude and magnitude of such times as he could feel how wrong such problems were for females in such situations. He chose my name Susan, because of needing to find a way to be able to fix and repair such for more people hoping I would be the catalyst for such changes in a much larger way and instead of how he knew he could have shown her ways to protect herself when he was younger to a smaller degree; when he met my Bok Gung and my Bok Pu prior to the Mao Ze Dong situations to help get them to safety in such times, the friendship and familial aspects became more than just one or two situations which he could not ever allow himself to deny.
My Bok Gung and my Bok Pu had a son which they had brought over from China as he was the only child they could have, as such situations were as they were when a female delivered a child which was male first as to keep such portions regarding what was already occurring in the Chinese population at such times to only have one child for the population control compared to having one child whichever gender to keep. When getting to the United States of America because of the agreements they had upon such journeys and treks across the lands as such traveling during the times were far slower than anything seen in the 1990s onto through the 2000s onward, they had promised him that the middle name they chose for me of MeeLing would be the way to assist such a solidification of such an assistance because of their gratefulness and thankfulness to be able to get to a country which the Constitutional Rights and Amendments were still being worked on and ratified to be able to assist more as the times continued onward. Hence the double meanings regarding the innocence in both of my name choices, regarding such aspects additional to the Lotus Blossom because of the portions thereof. However if you search for the name MeeLing the reason why the technology tried to reform the name spelling to meeting was because of the amount of people who mistype at times, and the more common spelling is Mei in comparison to MeeLing as Ling is usually a last name in comparison to one word. Mei in comparison to MeeLing means beautiful which I suppose is an irony regarding Belle for my name choice I created of Lady Dori Belle and one of my favorite characters from Disney movies while not knowing of the name Dory or the name Lady regarding such aspects, though the ironic twist regarding having been born in the Chinese Zodiac Year of the Dog regarding such a Disney character name of Lady in comparison to how I thought such regarding Lady MeeLing during the Excalibur Renaissance Faire; however the name Mei in Chinese though in Latin means The Great One, which my Bok Pu and my Bok Gung had shown me the meaning for i.e. and the references thereof additionally to such aspects regarding how they knew how analytical I was already showing myself to be when growing up, as they explained to me over such childhood years.
However the irony regarding having taken 2.5 years of Latin which in Latin Mei means The Great One, which is a semi-funny portion when looking at such now. Thus in such culminations having been taught to me when I was younger had obviously permeated through such after effects of my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury after effects, as I named my son and my daughter in the similar ways as to how my name Susan MeeLing was chosen at such times for me. It can be seen in such patterns regarding the after portions regarding my name choice referring to Reverend Susan MeeLing in comparison to going by the legal full name at such times because of already being separated at such times to the portions thereof regarding such other situations at the time, as I knew at some point there would be the possibility of actually getting married for such a name change to actually include such a last name in comparison to such times; yet I simply was not at the point to which such would be, even though I had already told my now dead-ex-husband about such portions which he refused to believe and refused to accept until the points in time of his confessions when he saw such portions as to I refused to be a part of what he wished as such problems caused needlessly were only because of his ego and his arrogance thinking he was ever able to ever actually be in control compared to what I knew and understood and comprehended all along. Though my biological mother, biological father, and biological sister were along such similar lines as to wishing well before they ever came to Texas meant they refused to acknowledge when I had fought for my emancipation from those individuals to be able to do what I had already told them what needed to be done for years by such a time; their ego and their arrogance lead them in the wrong directions ever time, as they refused to know or understand that they were not the ones who could ever be allowed to ever be a part of such because of their prior refusals and had been why I repeatedly fought to get away from them while others in the state of Texas wished what they saw of those people were better in comparison to what I knew and understood and comprehended. Only those in the civilian sector with such similar backgrounds for certain aspects were able to know and understand such portions from their personal experiences of how such views of being embarrassed of just the association of being biologically related, could know of such situations of those portions of feelings from such aspects unfortunately for though was a connectionary aspect as to how such connections were formed over the years. Those who were/are a part of the Armed Forces of the Untied States of America, law enforcement, fire department, and EMS were much more capable to see and know of other connectionary points; however with such levels thereof, also were able to understand why I could only go into limited capacities of specific details during such times in comparison to the civilian sector because of the safety requirements the Armed Forces especially comprehends in a varied level of ways depending on what their MOS or equivalent was/is, though some were not able to see how someone with the lack of graduating Basic Training could ever have such abilities or background to be able to verbalize and yet at the same time would know of such wording because of such aspects.
Therein regarding such clearance portions when at the age of 17 years old compared to those who I had met when in Texas and later on would be able to know, how I was looked at in the MEPS office for such paperwork being printed for my MEPS paperwork for that portion just before going to Basic Training as the male E7 was not thrilled to see me being the first female to ever have such a clearance level at the age of 17 years old biologically; however the fact of the medical doctor I had in several military locations having to ask me my permission to check into my Basic Training as well as my background for such to what levels his clearances would be able to be allowed to look into, does also clarify other portions in regards of such signs regarding those portions thereof. While Dr. Kerry had to spend several months and we had several appointments in between such times before he was ever able to get enough information as to my background, it was more than 7 months before he was ever able to get such information regarding what my background to a degree was; though was able to get the information regarding my Basic Training after Zero Week or what was called Zero Week, which in turn regarding the C.C.C./CCC and C.O.C./COC courses successful completion by me on the first round made a lot more sense to him as to why I was at the levels of clearances I have and had at such times which in turn also includes why my identification card is what it is. While some have not known of such a clearance level name unless they themselves had the clearance level at a point in time and/or were informed of such a clearance level because of already having a higher clearance level, depending upon the MOS regarding the Army branch name regarding the Untied States of America means it goes off of the MOS initially chosen when going into the Armed Forces of the Untied States of America. My MOS was for an Automated Logistical Specialist, which is a fancy word grouping for supply though because I specifically had wanted to either be in the Infantry or Calvary or Combat Arms to be able to go into such Specialized types of Forces; I had explained to the MEPS station NCO as to why the at the time code for 91A, I would be able to go to any location to be able to make sure all aspects were/are correctly squared away for all such requirements as per knowing what would be needed the most and be able to figure such ways as to best get such situations squared away as best as possible. Dr. Kerry was able to inform me that I had been noticed by several Generals as to my physical capabilities as well as my mental capacities, as well as finding a few other portions regarding a bit of where I had gone for schooling in the recorded portions of the governmental aspects and had pointed out of how it was looked at regarding multiple tests compared to the other portions regarding the ability to explain in comparison which was viewed differently by several organizations and agencies. I admit I did not tell him or anyone realistically for years as to who my Grandpa Gavett was, as such did not seem important to bring up at the times of compared to what other portions of information was discussed.
When several years later I had told Dr. Kerry about my SCUBA Diving and the situations thereof in a brief way and brief amount of time, I watched how he tried to remain calm regarding what occurred during such times as he was upset regarding the portions when he learned about my first oceanic SCUBA Dives as well as the portions regarding the SCUBA Diving at the USS/USNS General Hoyt S. Vandenberg as to only tell me he knew I needed to remember he had been stationed and worked at Walter Reed Hospital and to go to Walter Reed Hospital, if ever the need or requirement felt appropriate. Irony regarding my transfer request additionally currently as well as the last apartment complex situation regarding such portions for such an ability to get other such aspects regarding the ability to move forward as actually required, and the portions to which needlessly has been needlessly been problematic regarding such civilians which includes those who are no longer active duty/national guard/reservists who seem to think they know better and/or tell civilians what to do when their clearance levels are not to the level of which mine are and have been far longer to which such needless additional problems have been a situation for those who have had to take care of such situations as per requirements; as seen regarding my SCUBA Diving gear and the #UHAUL situation, which at some point hopefully those who actually have such abilities with such aspects actually start to pay attention as to what needs to be done correctly in comparison to the perceived egos and arrogances as to such other portions thereof. When there are those who think they have an idea compared to realistically know nothing at all and only wish they would be allowed when they are not allowed such aspects, for multiple reasons which can include as to who they are associated with and/or what other extended portions thereof have nothing to do with what actually is required and needlessly waste time for several aspects of which others need such far more than those who wish for such in comparison. In my opinion of which I hope can actually be taken care of as such a location transfer is far closer to where I need to be in all such ways, in comparison to what has been wrongfully assumed the whole time by others.
Hopefully actually gets squared away properly ASAP in comparison to the other portions which has needlessly continued thus far as again, there is not the requirement for civilians to be informed of what is not their business to actually be informed of though since such situations regarding such civilians or villains regarding such problems the ironic twist regarding how other situations have occurred referencing such other portions to when the heroes and/or heroines. Some realistically have had to actually move forward despite others wishes and the needless wrongful problems associated with the Armed Forces of the United States of America and law enforcement have had to deal with such situations because of such certain types of civilians, which by the way those who are alive in comparison to when thinking about wishes from when alive before they are deceased are considered different because of such needs for safety and requirements thereof despite what some have wished for and hence why wishes are wishes or wants in comparison to needs. However such was known more fully by my Grandpa Gavett, my Bok Pu, and my Bok Gung compared to who my biological mother/father/sister have been, as they have not ever paid attention to what actually was and is needed compared to their wishes and egos and arrogances to ever think they have any idea for such as per their type of nosiness and as such problems have always been associated with their types of people means those who have listened to them in comparison to actually paying attention to what I know simply because of their own biases in turn means they have been problematic for such progress and movement forward; as they only know how to be as crabs, trying to hold back instead of learning from to actually do the correct choices because of such perceived egos and arrogances as those without ego and those without arrogance will not wait or hesitate for what is actually needed when such portions of direct commands have actually been sent forward for such requirements to go forward with what is needed. Thus the irony of the innocence meaning in my names Susan and MeeLing being repeated to get the point across as to why it is I, who knows and understands and comprehends to what is required compared to what is wished for.
What is in a name, when you think about such portions thereof? What is the importance of one's name or other such aspects thereof regarding other such current time situations when you think about the most small form of ways to know in which to assist or acknowledge such assistance regarding what was/is done? Even with such actual explanations the lack of taking such knowledge to understand the situations for the comprehension as to what actually needs to be done despite what others' opinions of their ideas are or have been, is another situation which the clarifications only lead to situations which the civilians are informed in the militaristic portions as to how such regards go for such failures to follow such as to what specific simple direct commands are as they do not actually need the explanations as that is just the arrogances as to being in the capacity to want such information which is not for them to actually know; which if having to get to the points of being yelled at or scolded because of such failures to follow the most simple of commands, only leads to their hurt feelings in which such feelings could have been avoided being hurt if they had simply done what was needed and required from the beginning portions of when being informed immediately as to what was required. Some questions are not needed to be answered to civilians and lower clearance levels as to what needs to occur and when such constant complaints or problems are caused only by such individuals such as children or dependents to such individuals not paying attention to the fact they are not the ones who had been involved with such works to begin with means they do not have the same ranking nor the same clearance means what they were informed of is all they need to know as to what to do correctly, for such works to go forward. Such has been problematic for several military members, certain law enforcement individuals, and EMS individuals mainly; as the constant lack of ability to pay attention to the signs given repeatedly as to who actually knows and understands and comprehends, compared to the wishes and words/pictures/videos/recordings which would assume such other circumstances to which then when as those who have dealt with such situations when in uniform knows how such goes regarding the levels of the lectures to the amount of time while being smoked at other portions regarding such failures to comply wish direct commands in comparison to orders which are obviously different. Timing is also extremely important as those with such aspects would know and the length of time to get such situations taken care of correctly means the length of time which such levels of lectures, only means the failure to have paid attention to the first time around has to be repeated regarding such lectures and such levels of words utilized to get the points across. I doubt there are many who I have met and known in prior years though more specifically between the years of 2009 through to 2013 who can truthfully deny as to how specific situations seemed militaristic in reference to my responses, when regarding their ideas compared to the knowledge and understandings as to such aspects at such times regarding the correct choices to actually be made in the proper responses and amount of time thereof.
Maybe there is a reason or a few more as to why I have liked and appreciated General James Mattis, and seen how much easier I could get along with such an individual in reference to the ways which he had assisted his Marines and life thereof regarding such requirements to get situations taken care of in comparison to when others regarding civilians and/or those who were not directly involved with such aspects as the additional aspects of having such other attachments have been problematic for certain individuals over the years needlessly because of others' assumptions as to how the actual portions of the smaller and more inner workings occur to get such situations properly taken care of.
When regarding the culmination of different aspects to which the only times I had heard my name was either where I had done something incorrectly or where I was having to be told of what else needed to be done, or where my failures were of where I simply was not considered good enough to just actually be able to be informed as to what ever had been worth such aspects thereof. In reference to my Medal of Honor Art Project and how much it took to ever simply push myself to even step outside of the view of what would have at such times been considered as normal to then force myself to push through such pain levels from the constant zapping and altitude changes from living in an area where the portions of what was needed for such pieces to be completed in the ways which were needed for such to be worked on as per what each individual piece required for the ability to finish just one piece of my Medal of Honor Art Project, just that one piece not forgetting all of the ones I had done since then had been to such a degree which if I had known if I had stopped being able to do as I needed for each piece how such would turn out to be; which is what has been going on for such times more recently, because of the knowledge as to how I have to complete such individual pieces as well as the larger whole thereof in comparison to what any could have ever thought or had any idea of. Thus regarding my Medal of Honor Art Project in such aspects each moment of time where I am unable to go to do what I need to do for such in comparison in such times now, it is only seen as to the unwanted portions thereof in a larger way in comparison because of already having reached out to as many as I had previously about other aspects written about over the years before my personal website of what I put together in culmination; to which the levels of which to continue to work on such and such delays for the ability to continue such has been a situation. How many times did I reach out to contact for request to help and then the ways of which went the ways they had prior to winding up in Washington state to then send out such books in hopes of more in ways which I could not and have not been able to verbalize because of the various portions thereof, not forgetting the specifics thereof regarding such portions in reference to the non-fiction books?
What did I see in comparison to such in other regards in person comparatively, when looking to such? I saw where the fiction books were considered as more important in comparison to the facts of the non-fiction books, regarding the portions of what was seen regarding more-so along the lines of Fail-Safe in comparison; and yet such references to that particular book was not brought up in discussion acknowledging that any had ever read such, which in turn how does that translate to others regarding the head nodding and the eye rolling in comparison to simply just acknowledging if actually had read such? If it had been purchased in comparison to having been sent as how I had seen afterwards more recently this year as to someone else choosing to take my works to then publish such elsewhere than where I had put such for the reasons I had done so, then possibly those individuals who had read such stolen intellectual property would have actually had the ability to speak in truth in comparison to the hidden speech of such in their own knowledge of having not paid for such knowledge in regards of the ways which is normal for them and would be considered as normal for anyone. If accurate as to such then the regards of a guilty conscience would not have been the additional problems for such if hypothetically true because of the knowledge of having read what they knew they should have paid for regarding such, as that set of what was going to be written in a series of three books would have gone in the ways of being able to finish completing such works as per regards of such times to work on as I had been while continuing on with what else I was working on; yet the disruption of the situations to then have to rearrange everything in my life because of however such portions had gotten into motion in regards of would have been as to be able to continue working on such writings. However because of how I personally am, writing such additional aspects to the Fail-Safe book which was supposed to have such additional books within the series has not been able to be continued onward as I had planned simply because of not being in an area which I can write in such a way.
The portions which I was working on up to the point in 2018, there was not the need to work on such where the comfort level of the surroundings because of other situations had not been able to focus in the ways which were required for what I was working on regarding such writings and upon the realization of other portions at such times; then the lack of a need to continue writing such books was made prevalent simply because of the surrounding situations which had been the cause of the initial changes in which to not need to continue such until in a location to which I felt would be comfortable enough for me to work on such continued works. As per the ways which the disruption to such had gone as I had needed to do such continued works as all of a sudden it seemed as though each were thinking they knew more about such aspects in comparison to what was required for such, all that had caused was a spiraling of unnecessary additional situations to which the lack of the need to continue writing onward about such was instantly enforced into my thoughts because of the ways which each aspect had fallen together regarding ever going further with any such writings until I was in what I knew I would need for the ability for such. In comparison to what occurred which only showed me the requirement to clarify the non-fiction books in comparison to continuing any works regarding the fiction books, meant that my focus was changed to the direction of what was needed for such clarifications in comparison to any of the other works I had been doing because of how I personally am. In FSL there is not a portion which shows where I only did one portion compared to the combinations thereof; to which to then make a time for pause in comparison to continuing onward with the culminations of as I had always previously done, caused the short stopping of all other such works to only focus the way which had been done regarding the non-fiction portions as when during the times before Washington state, when in Texas and such time since being back in Texas meant there was and is not the ability to ever further work on such additional fiction book series in conjunction with the non-fiction because of the ways to which I am. As I suppose has been seen at this point after being back in the state of Texas since 2019, there is not the ability for me to write in such a way and there is not the ways which to force such writings to ever be continued while in such a situation because of the levels to which those who do have creative processes would be able to know of for such understanding. Thus, furthering the views of being an unwanted artist for such aspects thereof in comparison and all such portions to which to hold onto what is not able to be held onto in such ways only pushes forward such thoughts in the regards of because of knowing myself and knowing how I best work.
While admittedly the ways as to how I wound up in Washington state and the levels of additional pain with the altitude changes and the types of electrical aspects for that area in conjunction with the natural formed energetic aspects of the region, the inability to do so in the region of the state of Texas is not a slight at Texas though it could be seen as such; it is simply the energetic frequencies do not allow such for someone such as myself, and was why the limited number of paintings I had created were only created when I was in my house in comparison to ever being in an apartment because of such energetic frequencies which in turn because of how such has gone the inability and lack of ability to ever write in the fiction ways because of the culmination of for myself to complete such types of writings. If people were to take a look at the prior writings regarding when I had lived in the state of Texas from 2000-2013, there are not any paintings which I created when outside of living in my house in San Antonio or Carrollton whereas paintings of which I had created at such times were only able to be created in my house in comparison.
There is not the way for me to pain in such ways in an apartment, as it is not my creative process for such a location as I would guesstimate there would not have been one individual who ever had seen me or my living arrangements in Texas at any point when not living in either one of my houses at such times which ever would have known I had painted and probably would have thought they could not believe I would ever create such paintings; whereas those who had seen me and/or my living arrangements when I lived in my house in San Antonio as well as in Carrollton would be able to discuss what paintings they had seen I had created. It has to do with the energetic portions of feeling comfortable enough to actually paint in ways which are able only to me regarding being in a house I personally own because a rental house will not ever have such an availability for me in the state of Texas; as per the overall situations regarding such aspects, as to my personal creative process. Thus why would I be able to do so in Washington state could be pondered when in a rental housing situation is actually quite more simple for such, as the area was still being learned and that was my only way to go through such a creative process to which in any location which I would have spent a larger amount of time to drive through on a multiple day basis in areas which would be considered as familiar to such energetic portions would be unable to ever assist with such a creative process as I personally am and do. Thus knowing where I can go for such a creative process is only as such in comparison to what others would wish for such, as those who do not have the creative process in such ways would not ever be able to know or understand sadly without ever having to force such words to be written in comparison to simply being able to trust me in what I personally know of myself and how I am. However my Medal of Honor Art Project was worked on during such creative processes and thus the additionally portions regarding such an inability to do so because of the energetic frequencies of the state of Texas would only be able to create such paintings in the ways of which are the only way for me to do so, would automatically be put on halt and would not ever be able to be worked on in the ways of which once was only because of such situations in combination and the process would only go towards the factual writings in comparison to any such portions regarding any other type of writing. The creative process for the additional aspects regarding the after effects of my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury would then be constantly a re-enforcement in comparison to ever seeing the ways of which could have ever been considered as helpful or useful, because of how such creative processes are for me; which in turn would have lead to the situations as of the ways can be seen now from the time of 2019 to the current times because only because of the lack of respect to what I know is my creative process and thus the lack of care and lack of concern would only be seen and noticed because of already having known other situations and since the timing portion regarding such energetic portions would only lead to the lack of ability to ever see anything of worth that I had ever done as can be seen regarding all such writings since returning to Texas.
Thus the unwanted artist portions would be very much in full because of the lack of ability to ever complete such works, and all such preventions from going to where I know would be the ability for me to be able to continue such works would then only be seen by me as being the most unwanted artist ever because of the constant wishes from others thinking that would ever be what was needed for my processes and yet would actually have the reverse effects because of everything I had already suffered through and endured during such times to which then such creativity would be lost to those who had sought such for the length of time it takes to get to where I actually need to be for such a process in any sort of rental location for living in. In turn the lack of ability to see any worth of such works and processes would be constantly re-enforced each second, each minute, each hour, each day, each, week, and each month into each year it took to get to where I know I need to be for such paintings to ever be worked on in the levels of which I personally work for such and the lack of any desire to work on any types of paintings no matter how much I attempted would constantly be nothing more than a creative process blocking in comparison to what would be possibly ever seen as the positive aspects because of the inability to ever acknowledge such by others because of whatever egotistical views as to such a process ever being more than something they would have assumed was just a mass production in comparison to the individual works that each individual piece of each individual artwork would actually be and actually is.
Thus the aspects as to the anger and rage coming forward only in writing because of the refusals of others who only have such a linear thought process would only cause further disruptions in comparison to what is a natural process of such, to then think to ask other artists who have not ever done any sort of work regarding the ways I complete my Medal of Honor Art Project pieces and their lack of any portion beyond an idea would only cause further disruptions and the processes would continue to be halted further only until the point of getting to where I know I need to be. Those who have seen my prior writings would be able to find the pattern of behaviour to see that lack of ability to push any type of paintings in all such ways as the inability to force such a process would only lead to a revolt against any such wishes for such a process to be within the state of Texas, and thus the continued back and forth would only continue onward until the ability to actually move into where I had known would be best for myself and my own creative processes. Yet I do not doubt there would be those who would have little trust in anything I had ever done or ever written to thus only continue to re-put me through what I had already suffered for years through repeatedly until they finally accepted the facts as to what I personally need for my creative process, which in turn would only infuriate them as to my attitude when they would assume hypothetically there would or could ever be a point in time in the state of Texas after how everything had gone to which their assumptions would only lead towards a path of destruction of every possible view of my processes and then whenever they would get over themselves to be able to get to the location where I have known I needed to be for the past 6 months; would cause such additional problems to themselves especially if their normal levels to work toward knowledge, would just circle around and around because of them needing to accept the fact there is not any way to control such a process in which they would ever have such a control because the only control of my creative processes are through me because of it being my creative process which then if there actually were any who actually had liked my artwork and/or my Medal of Honor Art Project to think there was nothing worthwhile regarding what they had done only because of those who would have been arrogant to think they could have forced such in an area which had not been for such a creative process in any form of after what already has occurred which in turn then because of how I pick up on energy would then send a rage towards each way until getting to where I would need to be for my creative process and thus would cause needless additional harm because of whoever would have such an ego to think the creative process is anything linear. In turn whoever would think they could wish to control such a process to try to force out in the state of Texas would only cause everyone else additional needless grief, and then the portions of which would come through as it has in regards of my writing because of their need to get over themselves and what they would think of an idea for such processes which in turn would mean they would only be able to control how much pain would be sent outward through anything done and would be worthless to the creations of life unless the preference is the destruction of all life and then such a process would be considered as successful because of their inability to let go of what was not theirs to begin with.
In reference to the other fiction book series, it is as it is. However the Fail-Safe regarding having completed doing coding back in the 1980s and 1990s for Prudential at the time as a child as my biological mother had worked there and seeing various insurance areas within the coding system itself, the reference to my response to the second Statue of Liberty being sent to the United States of America is a reference portion of this particular The Ornery Public Service Announcement also known as The Ornery PSA. What would an insurance company have commissioned to be completed if there ever was a catastrophic event which the one and only monument which is the world re-known monument for the United States of America do in order to maintain and sustain the general public's awareness as best as possible to ensure the most proper measures were put into place while researching and developing the other areas within the stratosphere of human existence within the United States of America and the world, to best keep everyone as calm as possible? Make a second version of the original Statue of Liberty commissioned to be completed to most of the measurements while keeping such hidden underground in various pieces to which if there ever was a situation where the #StatueofLiberty was destroyed because of an airplane situation gone awry as per prior investigations for insurance purposes just as the Twin Towers had already put into place regarding 11 September 2001, as during that event why are there not any pictures of the Statue of Liberty in the background images of what was the day of the second attack to the United States of America's soil after the event of Pearl Harbor in 1941; 59.5-ish years after the first attack on the soil of the United States of America, which I told people why I was fighting to get into the Armed Forces of the United States of America because I knew once on safer soil of the United States of America, I could explain as to what I knew because I could not remember which agency or group or organization or bureau to get to, in order to ask who to speak with to be able to get the correct information out regarding what I had seen and known as a child and teenager because I knew of what was going on and knew there was a need for such information.
In so much as the same can be said or written regarding when meeting my now dead-ex-husband when in Medical Hold Unit at JBSA, which after all such situations by the time of being able to get out from the posting area and what occurred shortly before regarding the rave and Brackenridge and meeting with CID, I was informed of uniforms then in 2000 as per my now dead-ex-husband having multiple uniforms from several countries he said he had been stationed within as a sort of type of exchange for services as I was told. I did not know who to speak with about such thus I simply spoke with anyone who would be able to know more about what I was referring to, thinking someone would have to know something as to who I could actually speak with as there have been so many situations by such a point regarding after waking up from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury; I simply hoped there would be someone somewhere who would be able to pick up the pieces of proverbial fabrics I had noticed, to be able to piece together if there were those into puzzles as I knew there had to be more who would have seen and/or known who could assist to put such together for a clearer knowledge and understanding while able to get justice wherever possible as best as possible for who as many as possible. I thought if he had told others and showed others as I knew and had seen him do, then the ability to then get such individuals hopefully to talk with the correct people as to find a way for such clarifications. I chose to get rid of the uniforms because I did not want the responsibility of carrying such another countries' actual gear and thus perpetuating any false view for such regarding any affiliation as per a military code of justice standard universally, as it is a small sign of respect in a larger way as many have learned when attempting to bring into some locations the aspects of what would and/or could be considered as questionable in certain ways prior to contacting first; the best way is to give over to the closest next of kin to choose to do with what pieces, what they choose to do with what pieces. For example, the Bronze Star situation regarding how that went I thought the same would be ideal regarding those uniforms as I did not know who to bring the uniforms to after the CID situation regarding the 7 soldiers time questioning me. I would have thought to bring such to CID, though I did not know how that would have gone after the laptop situation went as such had after the Chief Warrant Officer 3 and the direct order regarding the E7 turned E8 unofficially though officially regarding such a funeral and memorial situation. I would not be surprised if the United States of America's Armed Forces and Department of Defense with other such law enforcement agencies would want to see to which depth levels such would go or had gotten to, in various regards for such scenarios as per various areas of the civilian sector depending which section of the civilian sector you could and/or would be seen as in which ways. Some civilians while might be perceived as a villain and later superhero and visa versa regarding depending upon the motive, same has already been seen across various spectrums of the situations depending upon the individuals involved.
I will end-ish on the note regarding a male who I once knew who had a discussion with me regarding the difference between the words for the two main types of screwdrivers in regards of Nine Lives Books which ironically enough Cactus Jack AKA Jeffrey Kuykendall Jr had pointed out the word Nine in German or Russian means the word to the definition of no, which in regards of no lives books for the store name and how the store had gone in various ways is a different ironic twist some could suppose. That would be the same individual regarding the 151 Road Warriors, as well as the Alamo Draft House with the additional portion regarding the German World War II authentic uniforms; who also was excited to actually see and touch the authentic uniforms from my dead-ex-husband, as well as how that particular situation had begun and had gotten to regarding such garage situations and the particular beliefs thereof seen in FSL as well as The Modern Day Book By: Reverend Susan MeeLing. Thus furthering such additional above situations and information regarding such aspects, to which the above aspects in addition to the other portions are able to give the ability for those reporting such information the point to blurb the information previously written regarding my website #TheOrneryPSA #TheOrneryPSAByReverendSusanMeeLing #TheOrneryPSAByRevSusanMeeLing #TheOrneryPSAByRSML #TheOrneryPSABySusanMeeLing #TheOrneryPSABySML for such additional documents and references for such portions regarding the name aspects if in reference to the automated possible doxing for the election results in a different aspect if in reference to my name and those particular situations regarding the tagging correctly situation as well as the aspects of my website I created in the overall aspects for such clarification.
Though also having seen if you take the V out of lives, then the Nine Lies Books in comparison; which to be quite frankly honest, there is the portion of the fact of Suzanne Farnsworth's sister Cindy Farnsworth having been known to have as she admitted to having a multiple personality disorder; which in such situations as told later on as to how the store had changed locations, as well as they not longer have the cat sanctuary because of how many problems occurred because of Cindy bringing in more people to the cat sanctuary who had cats who were not spayed or neutered as well as the lack of immunizations to any of the cats brought into the cat sanctuary which included feral cats needlessly for Suzanne's trying to help the situations, though such discussions are for them to deal with one another in comparison to anything which would be considered as worthwhile after all such situations which occurred thereafter depending upon what the view of worthwhile would be considered as in such opinions. Nonetheless after such portions regarding the explanation in reference to how many times I had actually defending her supposed boyfriend Michael Roberts to the store staff including several others outside of the store who had known of him being involved with the store when having discussed the times when I had volunteered at the location for the online books which those were the only times of volunteering for such books as there was not the need to ever volunteer as I told them I was going to write books and there was not going to be any of the books which would ever be a free price by me because of my requirement for myself for the long and longer and longest terms possible which I was laughed at for ever thinking that I could ever be good enough to write any books worth reading. I suppose the ironic twist because of the fact there were only a few which ever had a single or two copy ever sold to which was apparently my mistake for not ever paying attention to the fact that I was laughed at for such. I suppose my mistake for also ever thinking any of my books would have been considered worth paying for to actually read where I received all of the profits in comparison as per the way such has gone. Regardless as to how such had been in regards of the multitude of various aspects, then comes into the view of the portions regarding the other portions of.
If in reference to the doxing regarding the correct and proper tagging and/or statement regarding specifics in which online people can tag themselves if they see themselves in a picture online and recognize such for certain accounts and those who manage whichever aspects regarding thereof as well as the amount per is probably taken into consideration regarding such calculations regarding technology, the situations thereof could be seen in such regards in a multitude of ways depending upon the view regarding such individuals referencing different events throughout the election cycle for the 2020 election and how such had gone in reference to #Georgia for the one group of events I went to in comparison to the amount of events I went to throughout the state of Texas. While the disability factor regarding the known flying portions and/or longer trips referencing the situations in Georgia if the aspects regarding my name and/or my website being known as well as the publicizing regarding my attending such was only in a last minute sort of trip, compared to other such aspects referencing which events within the state of Texas regarding such portions of such multiple rallies and events in Texas which some may have known about such though had not told me of such knowledge they had regarding whether or not they had seen and/or read anything regarding any portion of my website and my works of whichever types when initially meeting as per such an entry and prior such entries. Thus the portions regarding how such is viewed referencing events depends as to what was at such an event, meeting location, and/or etcetera regarding whichever aspects as to however such had gone during various discussions.
As the knowledge from those who may have seen my website, the portions as to who was where and what occurred in which situations and how many of what types were in which area as to whatever aspects I do support regarding the 2nd Amendment Constitutional Right to bear arms, though such a situation regarding such aspects as to how or if the possibility of such being known before is how such can be reviewed regarding other prior FSL situations regarding BAMC/SAMC twice as well as Irving regarding an ex-boyfriend referencing firearms and my response naturally for properly picking up on various feelings as to such aspects of hearing a loading of a shell casing on a phone call after hearing about a firing range and the discussions regarding my SCUBA Diving at the USS/USNS General Hoyt S. #Vandenberg and the admitting of the knowledge I had told the truth the whole time about landing at the bottom of the ocean as well as the Puffer Fish situation including thereafter regarding at the military installation with the knowledge of who was armed in the area comparatively when such an admittance on the military installation had occurred. As per phone calls during such times referencing such when I was in Washington state in 2019 for such times though also in regards of 2020 phone calls regarding the same individual, how such legalities are viewed regarding such additional portions is for the justice department for reviewal if others were involved regarding such aspects in whichever ways which could be seen from prior posts online via social media and the storages thereof regarding such servers in such areas for such posting possibly.
However as to such situations in culmination as some might wish I to be overreacting, think as to what it would be with such knowledge if you have the inner workings to such as to how such could be reviewed and looked at if ever found out to have had prior knowledge as to the situations surrounding whichever areas regarding such scenarios if I am hypothetically accurate regarding such portions as to the feelings as to being an unwanted artist and such combinations. While I know of the oddities regarding back in my childhood and my teenager years have been something I specifically told those involved regarding the United States of America’s Armed Forces as to why I was fighting to be emancipated from my biologicals at such times as already explained, I had gone to the United States of America’s Armed Forces to begin with to be able to help keep my country and the citizens thereof safe from all threats both foreign and domestic. I took my oath seriously, as do most who voluntarily take that oath in comparison. I went to get the information for the United States of America’s Armed Forces regarding why such uniforms were had as I knew I could not get such information regarding without doing so a certain way though also not knowing about such ramifications regarding the fighting to get the information while defending myself for such conversations which started up in my defense of myself and my children, as while it was a surprise to be pregnant regarding such both times and a happy Mom; the portions referencing the aspects of the information as well, was pertinent because I had seen such aspects before, regarding other such individuals in another location referencing to where I grew up and/or where I grew up going to. It was a high risk I admit such, though I was doing the best I possibly could in all ways possible in every aspect I possibly could.
I had not known of any ability to ever get pregnant until later after moving into the apartment at a biological age of 18 years old though awake from my coma for less than 3-4 months and actually being shown the uniforms in person, and I do not believe in abortion despite the other aspects regarding the other regards as to how I was truthfully treated though I do not or should write I have not wanted to accept the fact as to the levels of abuse I had dealt with because of already having known of what I grew up with. It is not to write those portions did not affect me as obviously such had in ways which I have written about and dealt with as best as I could, though such portions of my childhood and my teenager years were as such from my childhood and my teenager years; whereas after my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury and after effects, I truthfully had difficulties remembering much of various aspects and it took a long time for me to be able to formulate words enough to actually be able to explain such situations from my childhood and teenager years as well as into my adulthood years after waking up from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury and ways to assist myself to be able to remember on my own because of the situations regarding the after effects of my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury. The tattoos have truthfully been able to help me when I can see them in comparison to when I cannot, as I had admitted my tattoos are only for me to help me with my memory. I did not need to start on my hands for the longer term aspects thereof as the short term portions were and are also important, and the portions referencing having to be in a place warm enough though comfortable as well to be able to remember more easily and quickly in comparison to in reference to having to constantly cover up myself because of the coldness to a level along with the electrical portions of such an area as Washington state with such types of different altitude changes in comparison to the east coast as pilots would know of; those such aspects as to, would show such aspects available to be noticed one way or another regarding such interactions.
As it is known regarding how other such situations in combination have occurred in my past, as well able to see such portions to formulate your own opinions regarding such situations referencing the aspects of such aspects as the unwanted artist; which I suppose can be reviewed as if accurate to view additionally as to see such as even unwanted to acknowledge in any such ways as even if such was a way to show support regarding similar views which is appreciated, under the pretenses to such also is important to review such regards as to the knowledge thereof in such a process when looking at such depending upon such a view point. Whereas the Democratic Party #DNC has been outspoken in such various ways and have been known for the proverbial checking of the box situation, as I had pointed out regarding the Republican #RNC Presidential Candidate election for 2008 I had planned and did vote for Senator John McCain and Governor Sarah Palin; however I acknowledged I did not like the fact they were using the female card, regarding the running mate for the Vice President of the Untied States of America; which was a larger reason I think many had originally voted additionally for #POTUS45 Donald J. Trump regarding his choice for a Vice President of the United States of America, as per the background for such a position to make such important decisions referencing various aspects of other portions of the government aspects of the security portions of the United States of America and Homeland Security reviewal choice for #VPOTUS48 Mike Pence.
As an irony when looking at a few regards in reference to #VPOTUS49 Kalama Harris being from California and knowing of such portions regarding the United States of America’s Armed Forces branches specifically regarding the Coast Guard #USCG, the Marines Corps #USMC, and the #Navy #USNavy there is the direct knowledge and understanding with the comprehension as to the size of the boats such use as well as SCUBA Diving training referencing the Military SCUBA Diving and the recreational SCUBA Diving. #POTUS46 Joe Biden was #VPOTUS47 at the time of #POTUS44 Barack Obama when I had completed all of my work for my classes and certifications among what I could assist with regarding my SCUBA Diving, and because of how such possible investigations were prior to such times surrounding myself; the fact of it most likely having already been known I had discussed such SCUBA Diving with some people in person as well as the minimal online in comparison, as there have been those who have known how far in depth I can go in reference to various situations and thus the requirement to find out to fish out the individuals who have been known to have known in other such regards because of flushing out certain types of SCUBA Divers who should not play games with such as per the damages it can do the oceanic waters as well as fresh waters throughout various areas of the United States of America and the world; and such water is required for the life and sustenance on and around the earth for human beings and all such living creatures. I told the MEPS station after the recruiter’s station of wanting to ensure all was squared away correctly from the bottom to top in reference to my particular MOS, and what else could that particularly be translated to in reference to the particular aspects of such areas I have gone to regarding such overall in such times since waking up from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury coma? I suppose a difference reference to the portions regarding the Statue of Liberty aspects, some might be able to see differently.
I as others can only do the best possible to have kept my son and my daughter safe as possible while raising them on my own as much as I could for their best, which in such reference regards each individual’s choices are each individual’s choices for such actions. I believe in free will to live in line with the Constitutional Rights and Amendments thereof and as such, the ability to only control so much once out in other portions is up to each individual for such choices and actions in comparison to my ability for such with my own choices for my own actions to the best of my ability as possible. The last time I heard from my son, I was told he was looking at going into the United States of America’s Armed Forces Air Force branch which I had not fought him to be able to go into the Army branch previously and I hope the best for such overall. The last time I heard from my daughter I was told she had a fight with her younger cousin my ex-sister-in-law’s youngest daughter(s) in Grandma Nichols’ kitchen area with a knife, to which after her having still been in the back and forth regarding the mental health hospitals after what occurred regarding the Fort Worth Zoo #FWZoo and McCoy Elementary School of Carrollton Farmers Branch Independent School District CFBISD and the culminations thereof, I do not doubt she would after turning the age of 18 years old biologically had been taken to a different location regarding such legalities if that female had chosen to prosecute for such a situation in comparison to the times when she could have helped and assisted in a more positive way referencing the help and assistance for my daughter back in 2009-2010 in comparison to focusing more on what she could get for free in reference to her spiritual husband and also her dead brother instead of the living children biologically only in reference to being his actual raised children as he did not do much to help raise them up as per prior explanations to such times.
The choices referencing each member of both of my children #Letters4James and #Letters4Lidia and their biological extended families is to deal with such choices, as each one individually and collectively made upon such times knowing of such details.
While I had done what I could to best inform those within the communities I had been a part of in regards of the San Antonio Pagan community, the BDSM lifestyle community, the LGBTQP community, as well as the Swinger lifestyle community outside of the Stay at Home Mom’s group and other such areas regarding raising my children as each parent does as the do choose referencing both aspects thereof; I still had been and always was myself and such, I had and will be truthful. While in certain locations regarding such adult consenting groups compared to out in the open at more publicly known events there is a bit of discretion regarding such locations depending upon who you are, as some might not know of such other portions unless told specifically of whether in reference to an announcement of such as a visitation from such or a birthday party announcement; in comparison to an overall general public more known, in the overall aspect of availability to find such meetings in comparison to other hidden portions thereof which has the higher alcohol contents thereof in certain locations. In such reference regards I have not hidden such portions regarding those aspects and while such situations had been as situations had been, there are several differences able to be easily noticed in all such comparisons regarding such situations overall. In a crowded location for the size thereof the location there is a difference to such in a discretionary location such as, in comparison to the well known public sector if such portions regarding the aspects as to the general public and such portions of the general public’s responses in comparison. While I had not wanted though knew it was needed and required for such paperwork to be filed once being told of such IRS aspects, I had warned such individuals in such communities as best as I could to there being much larger aspects to such portions; which in the only ways which seemed available to be able to give some form of protections for if I was accurate to such investigations of whichever types thereof as per growing up where I re-grew up additionally to after my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury as well as before, the only such protection available was the only such protection available.
Especially if in accuracy regarding such portions via the election aspects referencing the facial recognition portions regarding the doxing and the election results because of the known portions of availability to tag pictures and with such the putting in of my name to link such and/or my website to connect to, would possibly give a different perspective as to the surrounding factors as to what was actually seen in a different way regarding such portions of such lifestyles and communities within such areas if such is proven to be accurate regarding such in regards of the technological portions of the voting integrity system as per the pictures taken with and the discussions thereof while they held their own cellular phones for such to have the pictures taken with me at such various events. The facial recognition as well as the cards I handed out in such addition to my website and what had been released by me in regards of my FSL books though the additional other books having been released without my consent possibly by law enforcement, seeing if someone with the squeekiest and cleanest records available to the public would actually be truthfully accepted or hidden away to see what situations would and/or could have actually unfolded regarding such overall portions as per the pictures and videos and recordings thereof as well as what contact and/or lack thereof contact and from who as well as to the whys. Who would only pay attention to which portions and what would such portions be in truth, in comparison to who would only pay attention to which other aspects and would such be in truth? How would such be done by each’s free will choice, why would such choices be as, also when in the locations as to the where as to what the surrounding view points would be thereof for such choices of free will?
I know after the Texas State Capital event around in May 2020 there were plenty of people who arrived for the rally and as more people attended other political rallies, the portions were moved from the steps of the Capital building out in front of the gates with the United States of America’s Army branch the National Guard and several uniformed Law Enforcement Officers, as the 2nd Amendment Constitutional Right combined with the Texas Open Carry Laws are and have been in effect for awhile though how such regards in reference to such portions as to such an election integrity review board for such information as to the voting portions of the overall 2020 elections in conjunction with all such other aspects combined into view then the reviewal of such aspects comes into a clearer view regarding all such areas and communities to such truthful portions as to whether or not the acknowledgment thereof is and how so regarding such community aspects in reference to such standards for each such groups and individuals thereof with in reference to such treatments if such portions were hypothetically known in regards of my works in reference to my website information I have posted on my website and connected social media accounts as to which portions I personally chose to release and how I had chosen to release such information in whatever portions of comparison. Other such locations depending upon the meeting arrangement depended upon the situations regarding such, and the locations as well as the overall portions regarding such in addition to take into considerations for such stand points regarding such discussions.
While I have admitted regarding my lifestyle aspects and connections without any shame, there also has been as such situations have been regarding such other portions when out in the general public locations as to how such situations can be reviewed in comparison to especially with if there were longer drives and/or flights in comparison. Which books were paid attention to which I have written though were they acknowledged as to such regards when speaking with me in person or not and same regarding the aspects of my website and works thereof if known previously or not, as the private adult consenting locations are where the adults go to speak about what they choose to speak with one another about in comparison to in the general public areas and such having much more open of an arena as to which levels as to the truths thereof in discussions as to which was paid attention to and thereof such regards in truth when spoken and by who. Those who have known me in person for a longer amount of time in whichever area thereof I would guesstimate would describe me as fairly easy to speak with and honest to a fault though honest nonetheless, opinionated though sometimes coming across as judgmental depending upon outer extended portions depends upon the situations discussed and could be misread though when stepping back able to see a larger picture as to such portions regarding the overall for such times; though in their own words which probably would additionally be a point regarding the length of discussions and depths thereof able to go to as well as personal experiences from their perspective, and in their own ways. While such consenting adult areas may have once been viewed as such in the discretionary aspects, in the general public portions as to the ways such situations overall can be viewed as such would be as such could be reviewed for those portions as to the overall. With the election portions in comparison to the aspects referencing the 2020 election results and the combinations of overall situations regarding the election integrity results from such investigations, it is a Justice Department situation with the Department of Defense as to how such might hypothetically be viewed regarding such events thereof as to such views regarding as to whether or not known and how such had gone in which ways at various locations and times. Again with the portions of my Medal of Honor Art Project being involved with what I do, how such other aspects seen in addition to my art paintings is as such is looked at for such situations. At minimum, I have been honest and transparent with my truth and as best as I can with my memory and cognitive portions thereof which have the ability to be reviewed regarding such additional information sources as per how such has occurred overall regarding clarifications.
The transfer process referencing such views additionally, depends upon who you are as well as how unbiased such vision for such clarity can be when taking such additional regards as to such combined situations for such. As it can be viewed in reference to the likeminded getting together, the portions of truth spoken as well is extremely important and such aspects regarding the unwanted artist journal blog entry regarding earlier might have a larger view point regarding such aspects in a different way at such a point in time as now in 2021. While some might have known more in the adult consenting lifestyle of such more well known connections in such adult consenting lifestyle aspects in a discretionary way, the portions referencing the general public acknowledgement is a different aspect when taking such portions into consideration. However the acceptance of the adult consenting choices are important as to the ability to accept in comparison to shame what is natural in reference to the adult consenting portions thereof, to which if there was an unknown regarding certain aspects referencing the regards of an adult version of the movie Who Framed Roger Rabbit had been noticed in regards of certain individuals regarding such poster girl sorts of aspects additionally; as in regards of what discussion could have occurred referencing the tattoo situation prior to an individual arriving at the photoshoot, then such aspects were/are unknown officially to me regarding finding such an individual and/or group involved regarding such as per other whispers among the groups and crowds thereof at such times.
In regards of the combined portions of the SCUBA Diving along with, the aspects as to the specific title of the stage performance referencing the character I had been assigned to partake in; I had told Steve about what occurred referencing my SCUBA Diving in regards of Cozumel/Cancun which I thought was an ironic twist to the naming thereof, as well as the portions referencing the USS/USNS General Hoyt S. Vandenberg SCUBA Diving and the Boca Raton Florida SCUBA Diving which he had already seen the pictures online. A different time later on after I had moved to San Antonio and was going to take my SCUBA Diving gear to JBSA before the UHAUL situation I remember walking by Mike and Steve talking as Steve told Mike “Yes, it really happened. She really did that, it’s fully on record” when I was walking by one afternoon as the two took a step to the side surprised to see me which I was thinking about my SCUBA Diving gear regarding how disappointed I was feeling in myself for not being able to successfully get such gear the correct way to where I knew it needed to get to, which was after I had already disarmed my daughter at BAMC/SAMC and such situations involved at such times. Just as ironically as explaining certain portions to a male I once had been engaged to when speaking with him before we ever dated regarding the uniforms, which similarly was upset with myself for not getting the answers to the portions in full as to the locations where associated with the uniforms regarding such times as well as not being able to think of who to inform of such to as even though there was the Chief Warrant Officer 3 referencing the stolen valor situation; it was not something I was able to think about at the time because of the amount of traffic and traveling I had done, just to arrive at the Laurel Land Funeral Home regarding such portions at the time which had actually had the agreement with my ex-sister-in-law compared to the portions regarding the agreements thereof for whatever upgrades she and Grandma Nichols had wanted for that situation in January 2008.
Though I explained as much as best as I could, the portions thereof regarding such aspects have been as they have been referencing the overall aspects to which it is frustrating to put mildly regarding such aspects when reviewing such information in the generalized overall portions to which the multitude of levels regarding such aspects are quite abound in multiple ways and areas thereof. As in the reference to the election aspects, what areas are more well known in regards to online aspects are at the point of review in quite a few ways to which how such is reviewed will and/or is as such is up for review. Which 10 Commandments did you follow at all times, when you think about such aspects just from whenever you got online any point in time after 11 September 2001?
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