Day 4 of countdown to 20 year memorial of the attacks on 11 September 2001 By A New Jersey-ian

Years ago I had shown my son a way to put into a canister of different aspects to be thankful for and while it was an attempt to teach him a different way of being thankful as well as to count his blessings while being able to find something to be grateful for, I knew at the time there would be a point in which all I would be able to put into such for in regards of myself was being able to breathe once he was grown up and out on his own as to then would be when my life would completely restart as to what would be whatever the situations would lead to. Having to go over that reality with my teenager son at the time shortly after we were in #WA #Washington #Washingtonstate Washington state after how winding up there, the aspects as to being unable to tell him of what was going on in the larger ways in other portions was a choice which had to be made for the aspects of safety to the best of my ability. I had told him to be careful of situations if there were certain oddities of what people said in his earshot or to his face as per knowing the situation as to the #CowboysDancehall #CowboysDancehallSA #CowboysDanceHallSanAntonio #CowboysDancehallSanAntonioTexas #CowboysDancehallSanAntonioTX #CowboyDancehalSATX #SATX #SanAntonio #SanAntonioTX #SanAntonioTexas #Texas #TX #Texasstate #MilitaryCityUSA #StoneyLaRue Cowboys Dancehall Situation was a problem, though because of already having brought all other aspects up to people in the San Antonio Texas area by that time in the year of 2012; I had to think of how to speak differently in words, because of the facts as to all such situations which had overflowed into situations as to the Stoney LaRue concert. Thus in all such words from that timeframe I had done what I could to inform others as per thinking as to the facts of certain backgrounds would be able to pick up on the specific differences in my speech, and yet the realities of such were not able to have been picked up by those times before winding up in Washington state.

In hopes of thinking on the topics thereof as per my writing styles having been varied depending on what I was writing at the times of per posting, the situations of having to take such to a different level at the moment who I met at the Stoney LaRue concert at the Cowboys Dancehall had completely and abruptly hit me in ways which were unable to put into words because of the levels of which no one had believed me about what I was dealing with up to that point. Thus in all such aspects of fully having to change what I said while speaking in full truth was extremely different to all such aspects as to what had occurred up to such a point in time. When in the back patio and the male had made a specific comment as to the situation, I had remembered something Ana and Matt had said to me which fully clicked into place as to the problems which had been going on for far too long up to such a point in time. Thus when the situations after the #USAirForce #UnitedStatesAirForce #USAAirForce #USAF #USAAF Air Force laptop to the time of regarding when I had a roommate named Alicia had told others making fun of the fact she had found me passed out in the back patio with what laptop I had on the patio table had been, there was no one who paid attention or took such situations seriously. Though I had explained the realities of what occurred when discussed in front of me in Erica’s also known as Discordia on #fetlife fetlife and in the San Antonio adult consenting lifestyle scene parent’s garage of the facts, instead of listening to me about the laptop situation as to what was on the screen as to the threats I had been dealing with prior to such times; the facts as to the discussions were ignored by her, because of how the preference was to focus on her in comparison to the reality and the truth thereof.

However I do not doubt the arrogances of some individuals who did not put together the timeframe of the Air Force laptop situation with Ana and Matt to any other additional situations such as the paperwork I had told people about of which the Armed Forces had sent out in reference to the leaks of the information about people, of which instead of taking care of what was needed the bandaids proverbially instead; which was going to need to be ripped off and then fully exposed to be able to handle the wounds thereof, whether or not people liked the facts thereof.

However in reference to such referencing the aspects as to being truthful regarding the aspects as to the #bandaid situation as to taking the bandaid off of the wound, this particular aspect as to having been able to get the transfer squared away despite the time has been able to get several portions squared way for those in regards of the survivors of the attacks of 11 September 2001, regarding in the overall way more specifically in regards of having been in the northeast areas for either being born and raised and/or having moved to the area for school longer than a few years in the 1980s and/or the 1990s because of the information aspects regarding several aspects of which as delicate as I can be in the references of such details when taking such into consideration. As those who know in regards of the 1993 attack as to the facts I have brought forward of some not thinking about the subway and train systems as to the bus transportation systems in addition to for the checking aspects to finding out about people I once knew as a child when growing up in #NJ #NewJersey #NewJerseystate New Jersey and going out to areas to see who was where as best as I could after the attacks on the #WTC #WorlTradeCenter World Trade Center the first time in 1993.

In the year of 2001 while there were many people in other areas of the United States of America who had gotten to the point of having a computer in their home as well as whatever they worked with at their place of employment, most people did not have cable or wireless internet the same ways as along the east and the west coasts. However as some on the east coast far more than those on the west coast as per the situations, the towers of the various types had to work in the ways thereof to assist the various levels of law enforcement as well as the fire department and the emergency medical services; yet in reference to the yearbooks of names which depending upon your school, depends as to whether the yearbook has all of the people from the beginning of school into the end of the school year, or if there were people who moved in the middle or whenever for the school year as to whether or not their name and/or picture will be in the school yearbook. In regards of colleges, I am uncertain as to whether or not they have a yearbook situation of which this particular journal blog entry is a bit more for the aspects thereof as well as the youth ages in regards of the elementary school aged and preschool aged children which includes a specific grouping of children in the northeast area of the children ages of all from infancy through to 18 years old with such aspects as to the attacks on 11 September 2001 and your friends from school who had gone missing after the situations thereof as a possibility because of the attacks on 11 September 2001.

In reference to the number which has been reported within the #911CommissionReport #911InvestigationReport 9/11 Commission Report similarly to the aspects as to the facts of the bus and the subway systems, a lack of a paper trail as to the full names and numbers of the people who were in the area of the New York City location and the Arlington Virginia location more specifically to the field in Pennsylvania impacted though not to the same levels of in this reference to take into consideration as the 20 year memorial of the attacks on 11 September 2001 to take into consideration for a non-political and non-politicized view of via regarding the voting portions as to such. As the facts as to the ways of the current year in 2021 as people are far more accustomed to filling out an application online compared to in paper for employment, the actual storage of such paperwork was kept in whichever locations as they were kept in. Thus during the year of 2001 the cloud storage which many have grown accustomed to in comparison to the difference between the year of 2001 through to the year of 2021, a larger amount of paperwork was completed by hand in comparison to filed only electronically to the comparison of both paperwork and electronic portions; unless you worked for a government associated organization and/or agency and/or group. For example when I applied to work as a waitress at #IHOP IHOP in the year of 1998 in #CrystalLake #CrystalLakeIL #CrystalLakeIllinois #illinois #IL #Illinoisstate Crystal Lake Illinois, I filled out a paper application in comparison to using a computer to fill out an application. The same is able to be said in reference to the timeframe of both the 1993 year as well as the 2001 year; especially depending upon how long a company had employees working in the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, for the knowledge thereof.

In reference to the paperwork and/or electronic portions, if the company had their own servers as the cloud was not considered official during such times in the year of 2001, when the World Trade Center had been attacked all of such paperwork as well as all of such electronic portions were scattered, if they had survived to scatter among the area of #NY #NYC #NewYork #NewYorkCity #NewYorkstate New York City. Though the #Pentagon Pentagon did not have the same amount of aspects referencing the damages thereof thankfully, the reference to the connection portions as to the water lines as to the metaphor of such patches, regarding the informational portions as software engineers could understand such aspects thereof in better detail as to the coding portions thereof for more specifically the Pentagon aspects. I suppose because the ways of which the structure as to my Blue Identification Card of/for the Armed Forces of the United States of America because of the combined backgrounds thereof in my childhood and teenager years additionally to my clearance upon the age of 17 years old, the after effects from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury I suppose was where I thought others would or could understand from the knowledge better. However I had not realized to the level of which some had not realized until later when getting involved with different groups and communities as to the lack of knowledge or at minimum, the lack of exposure to such knowledge as to the levels thereof because of how many had cellular phones as I thought such was normal by a certain point when I was living in the state of Texas in comparison to the computers in the households for such aspects to reference.

While I figured it was normal to the regards of getting Grandpa Nichols’ computer set up and arranged as I had made my now dead-ex-husband do more so of because of the fact it would give him more time with his Dad, and possibly thought it would be able to help his Dad speak with his brother Tony more to be able to assist with arranging various portions of; I knew I could help with the hardware arrangements, though it was better as I thought to give such time for the family portions to be able to have such times, as that was only their times in comparison to myself being involved more-so as to such portions. A reference later I can give is in regards as to a #FathersDay Father’s Day card situation, of which I thought it was better to have two Father’s Day cards regarding a familial situation to be able to make sure there was at minimum a time which the family was able to have that portion just for themselves in comparison. In such references to the aspects of the technology portions to the northeast areas, those who remember in 2001 of other locations than the coastal area states on the east and the west coasts and possibly certain areas within what southern states as to the technology reference aspects; the internet was still fairly new to people, especially in reference to the different types of internet.

Those who were too young at the time to remember or not born yet would not remember dialup such as #Netzero #AOL #AmericaOnline Netzero or America Online in comparison to the wifi portions, which when those who are around from those years when there was the dial up portions of the internet can go into the details as to the massive differences to the aspects of speed for such of which those who grew up with faster capabilities of internet and cellphone speeds do not know the length of time to simply turn on one of the types of computers from back in the pre-2000 year as they also do not know of the levels of paperwork which has had to be filled out back then. The closest you have now for such a reference as to paperwork in those years, are healthcare forms to fill out to know such levels of paperwork in the current year of 2021; though that too is dwindling as per the realities of the connection aspects, for he ability to move through appointments quicker which has its ups as well as its downs at times depending upon the situation.

In regards as to the facts of the situations regarding the World Trade Center buildings collapsing and the knowledge as to the fact the buildings were not fully empty in conjunction with the facts as to the amount of people on the street areas nearby to the towers themselves with the underground garage areas as well as the subway systems, I will go over each aspect in a ways which hopefully clarifies a few other portions as to the numbers which have been reported in a fake way compared to the real numbers thereof because of the facts some might not have taken into consideration though have been searching for a better number to find such aspects. First take into consideration referencing which numbers of children and teenagers went into the foster care and orphanage systems shortly after the timeframe of the attacks on 11 September 2001 in the overall areas of the United States of America in the length of time from the middle to the end of the month of September 2001 as to the specific ages and the information thereof what could be given for the initial aspects starting at the closest areas to the tristate area as well as within and then progress outward as best as possible for such portions of numbers for the assistance to find the aspects of the individuals in such regards of their parents and/or their legal guardians who were known to work in the areas of New York City in the overall portions.

In the reference as to children who were in school age levels at such times of your classmates, who did not return to school after the timeframe of is a starting point additionally as to the situations to look into regarding teachers and staff of such schools in such areas. I know my 2nd grade teacher Mrs. LaPianna had been who homeschooled me during the time of being in 5th grade after she was done with teaching for the day at Asher Holmes Elementary School, and that particular aspect may have been a memory for her and her family; which in that reference aspect as to such, the same in reference to teachers and staff of schools in the area as to the proverbial reference to the timeframe of the attacks on 11 September 2001 for a different type of back-tracing as some families did not have the connections where they kept in contact for whatever aspects thereof. In turn the portions regarding those who were school aged children who can remember certain people from those areas during those times, would be able to think about such similarly connected aspects as to those who were in my 5th grade class possibly recalling when I was out sick as to the overall length of time in such references regarding the viewpoint in reference to the aspects as to the attacks on 11 September 2001. In turn with the paperwork being more notable than the computer aspects of the cloud at such times, the ability to reach out to others was not the same level as per the current times in some comparisons; however unlike the aspects as to the #whitepages white pages and #yellowpages yellow pages which once had been delivered to people’s houses, the cellphone aspects as to the current portions as to searching for people is a different portion thereof for such consideration aspects.

In the aspects of that particular example, that is one way of looking into the actual numbers because of the facts as to the traveling systems throughout the area of New York City for those who had children at the timeframe of. In reference to those who might not know how the subways system is arranged, think of a long and large underground tubing which has however many floors of which when the impact as to the towers collapsing sending the force downward into the areas of the subway tunnels as to the debris as well as the passages outward from such a blasting zone as to the length of a distance which such could have occurred as well as with the fired thereof as to completely incinerating all such individuals completely without a trace of their existences or whereabouts. I admit I had not gone into such details before because of my knowledge as to such aspects as per the ways of entrances to the subways tunnels, as that particular aspect was far too painful for me to put into words when speaking about where I was born and raised because of how many people I knew who had taken such systems to the New York City are in reference to the 1993 attacks though also in addition to the attacks on 11 September 2001 as in reference as to the 1993 attacks as to the upset which had been in a multitude of references regarding the timeframe for me as a child.

In regards of the blasting area downward into the tunnels from the two larger towers of the World Trade Center in conjunction with the other portions around the area, those within the explosives areas of employment would be able to explain such aspects in a larger way as to the capabilities of such aspects with the overall viewpoint as to the downward trajectory as well as the kinetic energy in conjunction with the overall weight of such for the arithmetic as to the distance such could have gone in regards of the overall distance within the subway tunnel system as to such portions thereof. I do not know if anyone had noticed, though there were not many people who had spoken with news reporters who had survived being in the subway tunnels nearby during either the 1993 attacks or the attacks on 11 September 2001; both in the reference as to the New York City areas and connecting traveling areas, as well as in reference to the Arlington and #WashingtonDC #DC Washington DC areas for such aspects which because of the size of the area for such impact as to the Pentagon how such aspects could have flowed into the #DE #Delaware #Delawarestate Delaware and the #MD #Maryland #Marylandstate Maryland areas as to such portions thereof.

Those who were in Maryland more specifically, if you had noticed odd pieces of what could have looked as lint from a dryer floating around a subway entrance during that timeframe can give a better clarification as to the situations as to the area, in ways which some in other areas of Pennsylvania and New Jersey would be able to know of from being in the areas as to what noticing thereof referencing the smell portions of what may have seemingly come out of nowhere. I would guesstimate a burning smell mixed with chemicals you could not describe the name, though such areas as to Houston Texas could have such examples as to the scent regarding such in the industrial areas for what could have been noticed for those who do not live in the area; though would be able to possibly recognize certain aspects thereof. However the additional reality as to the amount of industrial areas within the areas of New York City as well as Pennsylvania such as those who would be more accustomed to such, may not have noticed more than just the floating pieces of ash or lint sorts of aspects thereof regarding such scents; however additionally for such plausible actual numbers for such aspects to take into consideration to the actual death toll numbers compared to the reports.

I would guesstimate the numbers reported are only those who had made it to a hospital or medical care facility to be able to have such records, in comparison to the actual numbers thereof as I had told people within the state of Texas as to being more respectful about their comments referencing the attacks on 11 September 2001 as their views were mainly as to the war portions afterwards in comparison to paying attention to the larger aspects thereof as to what occurred on 11 September 2001 and the other such factors thereof as the unseen portions. In the reference aspects as to the buses and how such would have been as to the non-electronic aspects to paying for a ticket comparatively as per the passes, the lack of records as well for the similarities in reference to the subway systems unless there were those who used a credit or a debit card for payment records. However the banking systems have specifics to which if after a certain amount of time has to go by before contacting the local governing elected official offices to go over such banking information and the ways to check such resources, for the individuals associated with to clarify additional portions of real numbers if their banks were in the area as a branch compared to the local state areas of the credit unions; of which I do not know how those particular portions of such work, to ensure getting the financial records looked into for such portions thereof during the timeframe to the current year.

In conjunction to such numbers of people who would be able to be found via their identification numbers in conjunction with the ability to use various identification cards for the clarification of an individual to return such finances to if still alive, then the aspects thereof to the portions of which regarding people within the towers themselves as to look into for such aspects as to wherever they had lived and/or commuted from for those records. In reference to those who had friends and/or family from the area of the northeast more in reference to college from the classes and/or fraternity and/or sorority portions, if you have not found them online regarding the beginning first 5 years of #Facebook facebook and/or other such larger aspects as to the original social media platforms such as when searching for, my sincerest condolences to you and those who knew such individuals in the overall aspects thereof for who you knew at such times. It is a double edged sword for me as I can only remember a few from where I had been born and raised as per the after effects of my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury, of which only through certain measures was I able to be able to find some people from the initial search when on Facebook as to the names which were on my Asher Holmes Elementary School t-shirt as well as in my Marlboro Middle School yearbook as out of the majority of; there were very few I was able to find at the time when I searched, and only a few from Saint John Vianney High School had I been able to find in comparison before having to let go of the pieces during the time in the Lodge at Madrona in Tacoma Washington because of several aspects involved regarding what had occurred in the year of 2019 up to the point of.

Nonetheless as to such portions regarding the aspects of the ways the building debris had fallen with the overall dust and debris clouds which flowed throughout the different streets and pathways for miles outward from the central point of the World Trade Center for miles thereof, possibly there is a pop culture reference for those who had not taken into consideration how such portions can be viewed as per the structures in the area from such points of view as per those who were in high rise apartments in the New York City areas unfortunately had to watch such aspects as to all of the people who were in the streets as per whichever locations thereof to such a point of view. However to the numbers thereof for such counting portions, possibly those aspects as to what I have listed in this journal blog entry bring such forward in ways which assists to make sense to be able to find such truthful numbers thereof to assist those who had known though had not known though felt such as to the situations because of whichever direct connections they have had regarding such realities. While I do not doubt there have been portions of fake news as then Republican Nominee Donald J. Trump had brought up during his rallies, I would guesstimate in reference to the aspects as to the reporting referencing the attacks on 11 September 2001 as to the 9/11 Commission Report as well, would bring forward the aspects as to an idea for what a view he and his family among others in the high rise locations were able to see from a bird’s eye proverbial viewpoint without the ability to go anywhere or do anything because of the mandatory factors as to being put on lockdown and the quarantining portions because of the aspects as to the attacks on 11 September 2001 would have made a Martial Law situation regarding the facts as to how the required portions thereof for the investigations as well as the clearing of the streets and subways thereof for all such aspects.

As I told people I knew who were complaining back in October 2001 as to the news reports being too much for them to bear, I could not handle nor tolerate how the facts of listening to them as to such portions while them knowing as to where I was born and raised after having been told. I was expected to have sympathy for them while they only watched a few news reports in comparison to what people in the areas where I grew up were in the middle of it and unable to leave because of the situations in the area, and in a military populated area to hear the civilians complain annoyed me greatly as to such portions. Over the years as such went on and how the airport security situations had gone as to how people could be wondering how such was more restrictive, confused me further in the month of December 2001. It made sense to me, which was and is something I still have not been able to understand as to how such an ease for others to willingly choose to forget about the facts of; which as per the realities of later being questioned as to whether or not I was truly telling the truth by Renee’s_bitch on fetlife or named Jason (I do not know the last name though the last I knew they lived in Fort Worth Texas though he was/is in real estate the way Christine Zahn from Cub Sapphire had been from what I was told and I was told his last name starts with a B: wheather or not you believe in spirits)as to the facts of in the year of 2010, I did as best as I could to remain calm when he asked me about exit numbers knowing I had told him I had been moved when I was 15 years old. Who has been allowed to drive a car in the New Jersey area at the age of 15 years old, since the 1940s or 1950s? I did not think it took a head injury to figure out most people do not get a driver’s permit in the various locations within the United States of America for cars, until after they turn 16 years old.

As per the situations regarding the adult consenting lifestyle portions as to how many had direct connections to the Armed Forces of whichever branch and/or divisions thereof, there was minimal I could do by the time after having met that group of people though the situation referencing who had been in my life at that point seemed of little worth or value to those who I had known at such points as to the occurrences. I could see because of the prior discussions as to the realities of what I was dealing with up to that point as to how few had ever paid attention to such during the times thereof with the exception of claiming the overdramatic aspects in comparison to paying attention to the facts, which each could have seen if they had simply opened their eyes back then in comparison to the latter portions thereof when after having registered my first two books with the #LibraryofCongress #LoC Library of Congress. Though in all reality, I did not know if that was ever going to be worth the time or the money for doing so as who am I compared to others who have had their aspects thereof regarding their personal connections? What would it matter as to me compared to them, as the aspects of what had already been brought forward had repeatedly wrongly been ignored as to such overall situations needlessly. Thus whether or not something occurred after all such warnings as well as what occurred in reference to such aspects between the timeframe of the Air Force laptop to Washington state, are such a multitude of quandaries to which the facts still remain the facts thereof.

In turn the portions of which having already been told by several of the TNG groups of their opinions and their choices while I had repeatedly warned others of such portions well before the timeframe of the years more active on fetlife, the portions of which the few who had paid attention to the problematic portions were not of what was seen as important by those individuals at those times. In regards as to the timeframe of the Air Force laptop when Ana and Matt had gone from San Antonio to Dallas at the Galleria and their trunk had been opened and all such items were stolen, was when the laptop situation had been as to the situations thereof. In regards of that aspect what occurred shortly thereafter had been what had been noticed in the reflecting backwards in the time portions to see such aspects thereof, in those regards. Thus in as best of a timeline as to those portions of situations, I will go over such from what I can recall, though I might be off by a week or a month because of timing as to the memory deficits and cognitive disorders from the after effects from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury.

January 2012:

Moved from Irving to San Antonio shortly after the New Year’s party after Patrick Kennedy had done a rifle drill with a shotgun and after I took the firearm away from him because of him doing a rifle drill with the shotgun and pointing it in my face when I had gotten upset at first about the fact of him not telling me about the shotgun and then making fun of the fact he did a rifle drill and was failing with the shotgun when he opened the shotgun, is when I saw the two rounds in the chamber. He thought telling me he had 1 firearm for security at the Bank of America was good enough of informing me of having a firearm was acceptable which I told him, I did not think it took a head injury to figure out there is a difference between a handheld firearm that went with him to work each day is different than leaving a loaded shotgun underneath the bed without a lock and in a soft cloth bag was not the same which upset him and we had an altercation which he did not care about or know why I was upset that he knew my daughter’s situation as per McCoy Elementary School Fort Worth Zoo as well as I had told him about the facts as to the gun safe situation from when in San Antonio as to my dead-ex-husband which he thought was a funny joke. I left shortly after as he thought I was overreacting to the fact he hid a firearm from me wrongly as a Mom as well as he thought I was over reacting to leave him for the choices thereof to call me names in front of my son, despite the fact for months I had already been telling him to contact his own son as to not try to be a Dad to my son and my daughter as per the fact his son needed his attention in comparison to my children.

We argued about whether or not he should inform his ex-wife about his payment increases and he said he thought I was being biased towards his ex-wife by taking her side because of me being a Mom, which when I met his parents back in December 2011 I had told them about his lac of attention to his son in the correct ways which his Mom did the same sort of smiling Ms. Rose had done when she heard something she did not approve of though knew it was a fact. When I left he refused to let me into the garage to get my belongings just as he refused to let me get my belongings later out of my storage unit as he had stolen all of my belongings out of my storage unit as he did not have more than 3 items in the storage unit. I sent his online confession as to the stealing of such items to my insurance company though they said it was not considered good enough as to the situation because of my prior insurance claim after the theft of the UHAUL truck as to the situation thereof; which had my SCUBA Diving gear which I had been planning on taking to Fort Sam Houston instead of what occurred. As per the facts he fought additionally with the movers because of him not agreeing with my choice for my children and my safety, I did not care about his opinion as to what I was dealing with and the decisions I needed to make in comparison. As he tried to tell me how to be a Mom, I informed him when he actually was a Dad I might allow him to speak with me about whether or not his length of time in the overall would be considered as good enough which upset his ego which I did not care about his ego or him by that point simply because of the firearm situation. He knew what I was already dealing with and just as he did not care about contacting his son for over the time of having been involved with him, he did not pay attention to any of the details as to the reality I was dealing with and only put my children and I at a higher risk in comparison to ever actually being helpful as he claimed.

February 2012:

In regards of dealing with the insurance company situations in addition then I met Ana and Matt which is the #USAirForce #USAArForce #AirForce #USAF #USAAF Air Force laptop and the #Dallas #DallasTX #DallasTexas #DFW #DallasGalleria #TheGalleria #GalleriaDallas #GallerieaTX #GalleriaTexas Dallas Galleria situation referencing Ana and Matt or succubus and boy_Pup on fetlife in the regards of that situation, which few took me seriously in the San Antonio community when I had told them about the situation because of how I had explained the situation as they claimed only because I had described such in a funny way in comparison to them paying attention to the facts. Those two had tried stirring up drama between ClubFEM and I because they thought it would be a fun game to play as they thought that because I am a Female Dominant that I had problems with the facts they had heard about ClubFEM being only professional dominatrixes, which I had told them otherwise. After the event in reference to the Dallas Galleria situation when I refused to play their game, Ana threw a fit and said that she did not think I was fun. I did not care about her opinion as her opinion meant nothing to me as to what I needed top take care of, and she thought it was funny about the messages I was dealing with in addition as she thought any publicity was good publicity which I had vehemently disagreed with. As they had gotten along with my biological mother and my biological father when the time of hanging out had ended, so too did the aspects as to several other portions thereof.

She informed me she would tell her Dad who was retired from the Air Force about the situation, which I told her I dared her to tell him the full truth of the whole situation which she laughed and said she had her dad wrapped around her finger to do anything; which I told her not to play games with such, as a parent could only tolerate certain aspects for so long before they regulated as required. When the laughter occurred, I refused to have anything to do with her any further which she thought I was joking. I told her by my choice I would refuse anything and everything having to do with her and Matt, and she continued thinking I was joking. When it occurred as to me having told her to get out of my townhouse and stay out of my life she tried crying saying she needed to be in my life, and I told her she had done nothing which had ever warranted her being in my life ever. As she began spending time with people from ClubFEM more often as time went on and the situations went as they had, she was surprised when I cut her out of my life.

Beginning of March 2012:

I dealt with my biological mother and my biological father called me over to their house using my first, my middle, my Maiden last name, and my legal Widow last name which then the aspects as to dealing with the interrogation in their sitting room area near the dining room over such times; which I had told Erika or Discordia as well as Alicia about and they thought it was hilarious which I fully disagreed as to such aspects of having to deal with that. I had told others about the situations in the adult consenting lifestyle, which most simply laughed at the aspects of because of how I had explained the realities of what I had dealt with in comparison to paying attention to the facts thereof. Though no one saw a problem with the interrogation nor saw a problem with the facts as to what Patrick Kennedy had left of the answering machine message fully re-outing me to my biological mother/father as to the times as they had already known from the year of 2004 as to my involvement of such, their choice to ignore the realities of had only been another aspect as to how I had always been treated because of how my biological sister had manipulated the situations wrongly; though in such if such a connection to Ana and Matt, would prove to be a different set of consequences which because of the length of time which she had already gone on in such ways meant she would not be able to ever get out of due to the length of time referencing all such connected aspects as to the technology portions thereof as well as the amount of devices and etcetera. Upon simply doing what I could at such times for my daughter, my son, and I to simply live as best as I could make possible, the situations continued going onward needlessly.

However in such reference aspects as to an ex-ish relationship-ish referencing the aspects as to the male who went to Washington state as to the #SCUBA #SCUBADiving SCUBA Diving portions as per the confession he had made on the phone calls as well as when on #Bremerton #BremertonWA #BremertonWashington #BremertonNavyShipyard #NavyShipyardBremerton #NavyMarineShipyard Bremerton Naval Shipyard when seeing the #USSNimitz #Nimitz Nimitz and etcetera, if Patrick Kennedy had noticed that male around anywhere as to when I had moved from Austin to the Irving area during the timeframe in 2011 then the realities of such length of time for such involvement as to the problems of that needing to be let go of as per the realities of not being required for such aspects. The lack of genuinity and the confession of his which he knew I had repeatedly said “No” to him, meant the situations of which had been problematic from before ever going to #Cancun Cancun/#Cozumel Cozumel as per the flight and etcetera; though I had not spoken with Patrick Kennedy about my SCUBA Diving despite what occurred in reference to the move and all such problems thereof afterwards to my SCUBA Diving in such references. When that reality had set in was when that reality set in, of which the facts are the facts. Thus the amount of people in the reference aspects as to such portions regarding SCUBA Diving, have been required to review such portions as to the ethical aspects to their morality. I think those people have thought they were able to be immortal because of having the technology which had assisted them to be allowed to go to whichever depth levels they were allowed to go, of which in such reference aspects the irony of any being involved with technology and ever thinking to disrespect such portions thereof is a different opinion set which I do not feel is worth my time.

I prefer to enjoy life despite such situations which I have not enjoyed life, for years. I can find little pieces here and there I have been able to enjoy, though not in the ways of which I personally view enjoyment to which the aspects thereof are as they are. It would be great to actually enjoy life, maybe it can actually occur though I know to keep breathing in comparison to ever holding my breath for those aspects. At this point I could not care about anyone else’s enjoyment of whichever type thereof, as per it is my life and thus my enjoyment supersedes theirs in my opinion.

Middle to end of March 2012:

My daughter needed to be put into #LaurelRidge Laurel Ridge after the situation on the #FortSamHouston #JBSA Fort Sam Houston base in the #ER Emergency Room area and having to go over such details thereof before as to such realities, the aspects thereof have already been written about. Yet the same aspects as to the situations had been ignored by those who had been told in person as the laughter in comparison to paying attention to the details thereof, were something of which has not made sense for several years though is for such to figure out on their own as to why they chose to ignore the facts at such times as it has confused me for a bit of time how such was not realized by who I had spoken with.

April 2012:

The situation as to having met a couple at Mike’s house after the Air Force laptop situation which the amount of millennials who started arriving and began to infiltrate the groups while going on about pop culture references, was alarming in a multitude of ways. Each of the millennial aged individuals which admitting I am technically the age in the millennial category though I am not the typical type thereof mainly because of the facts as to the pop culture references, of which few ever paid attention to what the specific reference portions were at such times. While many thought I was discussing their immaturity which admittedly yes there were such aspects, the facts as to the reality of which their focus was more on the pretending from Hollywood compared to paying attention to reality and not reality television though in person in reality portions was alarming which few paid attention on either side of such portions thereof. While I do not know if there are any pop culture references to people in reference to computers and what other such portions thereof are or could be, those who would be able to refer to their own pop culture references as to any such regards as to the #GeekSquad Geek Squad and the #BestBuy Best Buy situations can look into such references in conjunction to the aspects of how that might have been in such comparisons as to the Geek Squad insurance portions as to only being able to purchase a device in comparison to the insurance at such times.

While since then I have been able to get insurance referencing such aspects, it has been difficult in other ways of other situations regarding the car/vehicle situations because of how many times despite the fact of being a safe driver; the other factors as to others’ involvements needlessly, because of their failures to realize what the situations were, and the lack of clearance for such details thereof. Clearance is extremely important regarding several portions of which several who I once knew in person had failed to acknowledge or accept, which they have been required to accept such realities and the situations which have been problematic have been required for such clearing as to all such clarifications thereof; as though it has been difficult in reference to the aspects as to accepting the facts of the knowledge regarding the #USSpaceForce #USASpaceForce #SpaceForceDoD #DepartmentofDefense US Space Force, it does not change the factors thereof regarding the clearance levels.

Local and state do not ever have such clearances from my knowledge or understanding, to which the situations of other aspects have been notated for quite a length of time of which such realities thereof have been required for being handled in all such ways as to the facts of which there are reasons as to why despite who might be connected to who it does not change the fact the clearance levels do not transfer and those who have fallen into such honey pots have been a problem for other reasons thereof regarding the safety and security as per the length of time thereof regarding those types of problems as per those who are willing to do certain things and yet are not willing to actually take care of the requirements thereof have been the causes of multiple wars needlessly because of such overt overdramatic problems from those types of people who think that the honey pot isa the ways of the universe; when the furthest aspects are the reality, as the honey pot are called a trap for a reason. Those who have fallen for such portions as to the honey pot trap, have cause needless death and injury over the centuries and have been the sources of which have needed full eradication of such portions as per the realities of which the aspects as to the requirement for more than just one or two aspects which appease others for a bit of time in comparison to the relationship aspects.

Those who have fallen for such and caused the needless portions over the years were destined to be caught in the time of which their full portions of all such extortion connections as to the ways which of in what I learned about regarding for some people who go to #LasVegas Las Vegas compared to others, as to the portions thereof. In turn while some might think the aspects of the sexuality are the ways of the world, the ways of the ocean and the ways of the galaxy and the ways of the universe have minimal needs for such portions in the ways thereof despite the wishes in such regards whether or not people have come to accept the realities thereof or choose to believe such realities. In turn as per the technology aspects as to the portions referencing the aspects as to the bump portions as to the Apple program years back in if I recall correctly the year of 2008 or 2009 for such a release date, the aspects referencing if the aspects as to the legalizing certain portions in reference to the aspects as to the adult consenting lifestyle portions more along the lines of the BDSM factors with the knowledge and explanations of the portions to genuine consent compared to the forced aspects thereof can be considered as to certain situations as to clearance level situations because of depending as to the legitimacy thereof as to what could have been discussed with those who were not at the proper clearance levels thereof. Especially when taking in consideration the technology portions of all such records, which the fact as to the lack of concern or attention to details by those I knew was something and is something I could not understand as to the callousness of so many adults who had more experiences in the lifestyle than I.

For example in reference to how I learned from what I was told several months after the Air Force laptop situation, a male who I knew which I cannot remember his real name though on fetlife when I met him he went by in person as well tender_male though changed it to TM if I remember correctly had explained as to how all such females in ClubFEM were only professional dominatrixes. I had been confused and when we spoke in person later, he had informed me as to the reasons why I had been ostracized within the ClubFEM group had been due to the fact of me being a non-professional as a Female Dominant which that group had according to him been against Female Dominants who were not professional dominatrixes. I admit I did not want to believe the portions thereof though in other ways I suppose certain messages I was dealing with at the times make sense now in the references thereof, though he had also told me he had been a Correctional Officer in Bastrop before the fire which occurred and he as well as other submissive males had been upset when they had situations which occurred and the professional dominatrixes they knew had done nothing to help the situations. He had pointed out to me as to how those females had looked towards me as to the ways as to how the situations had occurred referencing the lack of help and assistance in reference to the knowledge as to what I was dealing with in reference to what occurred to my daughter and what I was doing the best as best as I could for both my daughter as well as my son while doing what I could to maintain my sanity, which he had informed me of what occurred to LucilleBallbuster online name and in person name’s apartment as to a fire which had occurred in reference to having noticed her with a person who he knew had been a felon in the correctional facility where he had worked.

He informed me of the situations he and other guards had heard the prisoners speaking of in reference to people on the outside, for which others in opinion should have been notified thereof as to such situations for the ability to keep safe from such aspects and the protections thereof regarding such realities if hypothetically accurate. Just as he had informed me as to the aspects as to how he had seen the other females looking at me when at the Thanksgiving Dinner which I had defrosted the turkeys for anyone to be able to eat to begin with aside from whatever side dishes they had brought to the event itself, as he had noticed additionally the comments which had been made about such portions thereof in my direction as to their opinions of my choice to help LadyRobin name on fetlife and in in person when in the adult consenting lifestyle for the clarifications thereof. A little bit afterwards from other discussions he and I had were in reference to aspects as to what others had told him their opinions of me had been of which I had been surprised as to the situations thereof as I was explained though made sense in other aspects thereof, while additionally informing me as to what LadyRobin had told him of her opinions as to me later on. Shortly after such discussions had been when I received a phone call from LadyRobin when I was at a Home Depot about something which occurred with Maitresse Renne online though in person as well, as to opinions which made little sense as to the facts she claimed were facts were not the truth of what was. As I had made attempts to clarify, instead she hung up the phone on me as she was not willing to go into the details in depth as to what such false claims were.

While the coinky dink as to the Air Force laptop situation of such times and not knowing what type of laptop it was nor what the types of programs were on such or the capabilities thereof, few believed me about other aspects I had already told them in reference to the aspects as to technology to begin with in reference to simply typing a single letter and the amount of programs which would register such as per on any device. Having already had the aspects as to my lunch munch group I had created in the Austin area, I additionally dealt with the upset regarding a male who had approached me about being interested in ClubFEM and had asked me about speaking with the group leaders about being allowed to attend a munch. I had contacted LadyRobin which she had been upset that I had the nerve to bring such up as she did not like something he had said online, which in turn the situations as to such portions had gone as such had as to my lowered level of involvement with the group as per not being a professional dominatrix as to only being a Dominant Female in such regards. After awhile, I simply just left the situation alone as I was dealing with a lot more than most realized at such times despite having let such aspects to various degrees to be known as per the forums as well as other writings.

May 2012:

After awhile I had began dating a couple of which I have already gone into such details as to how such problems were in the ways thereof, which ended shortly thereafter as per my unwillingness to participate in such aspects as I had already dealt with being forced against my will and there was always going to be a massive fight against anyone and everyone who ever tried to force me against my will into anything I did not approve of and thus by the end of the month. However as per my usual at such times, I did not delve into the details as to the end of a relationship unless something was brought up because of having the self-respect as to not complain about little things as per compared to what I was dealing with in reference to my son and my daughter; the needless drama was always considered less important to me, and that had been before I had children as I did not care to get involved with childish garbage as such even when I was a child as per how I had grown up. However due to what had occurred in reference to how my son and I wound up in Washington state as well as during my Medal of Honor Art Project, it became time to break the silence as to such.

I fully hate the situations involving all of those people who had needlessly involved themselves without ever asking me in person as to what I needed, as well as assuming they ever knew me to begin with because they thought they knew everything from reading online; when it takes more than that of which the stalking and the harassing needlessly only infuriated me further, to which I do not ever want nor need to see those people again in my opinion and the lack of any need to have anything to do with such ignorant individuals as to how situations occurred thereafter as well as before. I knew Patrick Kennedy was going to do as Phillip Omstead had done as per the fact of having been introduced to by that, and I did not need or want anything from such situations as per the knowledge as to how those people in the FDFW area had the same type of view point regarding my tattoos and my hair. The fact that Jason had gone on in reference to his opinion after the exit number situation was ridiculous as per the immaturity as to such aspects of his opinion, and the fact he ran and hid when Renee had needed help was a different opinion set. In turn the aspects as to such childish and needless behaviours in my life was exactly as such, childish and needless. It would have been much safer and much easier to simply tell me the truth, in comparison to playing such games.

In such references as to the disrespect as to where I was born and raised for such antics additionally, the lack of the requirement for me to ever have anything to do with such behaviour as to the facts of already having dealt with such sort of situations in the San Antonio communities; which only infuriated me further. The lack of attention to details as well as the arrogance to think that there was anything in common at such times beyond the lifestyle, infuriated me as to such situations. Upon reflecting in the year of 2019 as to how what occurred in reference to my Medal of Honor Art Project and further, I only grew with fury and rage as to those types of people as to the lack of discernment as wsell as the lack of maturity when appropriate. Those people did not pay attention to the details I had given them when in person and their refusal to ever think to speak with me in person about things as situations went on to only complain to others instead, was a large waste of my time as I did not have the patience for those types of antics. As Ana and Matt had tried to push for drama online when I told them to stop and leave me alone, they said they thought they knew better about online portions and knew how to make things go online the ways they wanted for the entertainment value. I told them I was not interested as to such situations as per my life was not meant for entertainment, and I would reign down hellfire if I had to in order to make my points known and understood as to why it is always better when I am in a good mood than in a bad mood. Ana laughed as Matt thought I was joking, when I told them there is truth behind every joke.

As Ana told me in ways she admitted to try to get me to be jealous as to Renee and Jason buying a church building as to the lifestyle, I told them it was a bad idea to push for such drama continued as well as it was a bad idea for the church they were telling me about as that church had already had multiple situations as to certain aspects. When asked what I meant, I told them that certain locations when arranged are only meant for certain aspects and the spirits of which would come forward for the destruction thereof would not be kind if those people continued with such portions to push forward. Ana and Matt laughed saying they hoped so as it seemed fun, and I told them that if they did not stop what they were doing the repercussions as to such would be out of my control as to any help or assistance as per the ways of wherever those people were looking to get a location to have such and they should look elsewhere for such portions as that church had followers nearby and still were keeping an eye on that location. I did not approve of such portions regarding the church choice, and the facts as to the reminder as to who I once had been engaged to twice with had only infuriated me further as to the situations I was dealing with already. I did not want or need any further problems at that time or thereafter though hypothetically since such immaturity had been so problematic as to such amounts of millennials in the lifestyle, the problems of which only continued to overflow which I had told multiple people not to push me any further as I was at my breaking point of controlling my rage energetically. I knew if those people did not stop themselves as to such portions my rage would get to the point of which I could not control the aspects thereof, and the situations referencing the connected aspects would rip open the aspects as to the facts of what I had already dealt with in ways which what occurred would be whatever occurred and would be for them to deal with as well as them to take responsibilities for their choices and their actions however so.

In conjunction to not having told anyone about Irving as to what had occurred because no one had believed me about what I was already bringing up in reference to all of the other aspects combined and the choice of refusing to discuss such portions in full without any actual proven reason regarding any in person discussions, I had put myself on lockdown referencing refusing all such topics associated with the portions thereof in full; as to despite the fact of the US Space Force being officially designated to such as well as the pictures and videos I have taken over the years, the lack of the requirement as to such as per the fact of how many reports of fake news there had been in the reference to the aspects of different speeches then #GOP #Republican Republican Elect #DonaldJTrump had brought up in the rallies thereof. In turn because of the situations thereof, the fuller requirement for each reminder from hearing such only furthered all such aspects as to several portions to which I still remain silent even in the typing ways thereof referencing such aspects due o the realities as to situations over such portions. While writing or talking about the aspects of my Medal of Honor Art Project trips is one portion, the other aspects are not on land and thus not in the same classifications of requirements for my purposes of any such furthered discussions. Due to the facts as to what had occurred due to such portions in addition to the facts of other aspects referencing more specifically my SCUBA Diving, the lack of any requirement or need to discuss any portions of either aspect in details beyond what I have already gone over are exactly as such.

In regards as to what occurred as to the timeframe between the Air Force laptop to the after portions of the Stoney LaRue concert at Cowboys Dance Hall in the year of 2013 and then later learning about other situations, the furthered lack of requirements to discuss or write about any such portions became mandatory in all such situations of which then the realities of which regarding the Air Force laptop and the situations with Ana and Matt were further problems in person before the end of such associations as per their preferences regarding who and what their choices were in all such ways thereof. In turn referencing what was figured out in the aspects as to the Best Buy Geek Squad aspects in #Portland #PortlandOR #portlandOregon #OR #Oregon #Oregonstate Portland Oregon as to the insurance portions thereof, the lack of the requirement as to any such portions referencing how many problems in larger ways began shortly after the Air Force laptop had been lost due to those two people and their associations who assisted them.

June 2012:

The full ending as to the relationship between Joseph and Megan Estes and I because of the facts I already explained and put into writing later, though those people did not realize the facts as to their wishes as to trying to use the portions of what is within the radicalized Muslim aspects would bring forward the problems I guesstimated back in such times due to the fact as to their lack of concern as to how people view those radicalized beliefs once having realized how such does not and will not ever align to the Constitutional Rights of the United States of America because of the ways that particular set of rules within certain facets of as to Women’s Rights. I had guessed possibly as to the fire which occurred in the townhouse apartments I was living at had something to do with the facts as to what was heard regarding the situations at the #TacoCabana Taco Cabana near Thousand Oaks Apartments and Townhomes, though I knew those people would not realize how badly they messed up and how I would not ever allow them into my life in the ways they would or could ever wish for as per the facts as to how that one point in time would mark them permanently in my eyes and nothing they would ever do would ever make up for their choices from that point in time and thereafter.

In such references as I had already explained, I choice to take a step back from the San Antonio adult consenting lifestyle as to specific locations to be able to review myself as per the ways I do in regards as to certain types of situations. While I knew those people would be as children running their mouths thinking they knew better as to how the situations actually were, they had failed to notice as to the realities of what I had told them about in reference to the BAMC Emergency Room. As they did not know me before that occurred in person in the ways which they actually would have known me, they would only continue to fail with each and every step they would make because they would think I cared more about them than ever was there at any point in time and they would go off of their length of time having known about me in comparison to the length of time actually involved to which would be their full downfall as to such portions thereof.

In such aspects as to how some people think that celebrities who as I learned in regards as to the explanations as to pop culture aspects as to how some people think they know someone because of whatever movie or television show or online aspects thereof, I told people that the people who were characters in the movies they watched were not necessarily the same as who they were outside of the characters of the movies they watched. In such times as to the female who Discordia also known as Erica had pushed towards mediating the situations thereof because of what occurred at Mike’s house at a time I cannot remember the specifics of which month in the year of 2012; those three people meaning the two females and one male had been problematic from the start as to the female who later fell off of the ladder at the pool had been the problem from the beginning, though because of her age some thought that she was more innocent compared to the facts of what she was already known to have caused in other areas. The other female who similarly thought she was innocent looking, was destined to fail because she would go after the wrong individual who would not tolerate her behaviour upon finding out what her true intentions were. The male was destined to fail in reference to how he wished he could use the excuse he did not know and yet having been informed and warned as to what I told him he needed to pay attention to for the betterment, he would not learn from such and would think more of himself because of his age and not pay attention to the actualities as to the time.

However the facts thereof would only prove themselves as time went on, as the additional portions of which Erika would learn from the facts as to how the millennials can be if they are not properly educated. As she had brought up as to how many would be at her court room appearance as to the garden gnome theft situations, I told her that was not as important as she thought as she would learn as to when such small situations were only small situations as to how all such small situations would add up as to the length of time and all such portions thereof for the patterns of behaviour would bring forward the situations as to how much had been going on for the length of time because of her own inadequacies as to how she viewed people in comparison. As she wished I cared more about what she had done as she had thought her situations were more important than what I was dealing with, I told her that in the short term some might pay attention though in the long term into longer terms sand into longest terms she would be no different than many others as to such behaviours as to wishing that bad behaviour was more important when ion reality good and positive behaviour had always been the way to choose.

In reference to Erica having convinced me to allow Alicia to stay in my apartment for a small amount of time, the situations thereof were increasingly needless as to the situations added to what I was already dealing with. When she tried to tell me she was upset I cared more about my son and my daughter just as others had complained about such aspects, I did not understand how anyone could miss that fact or how anyone could think they were ever going to be more important than what I chose to be considered as important. If they had paid attention to the facts as to what had always been more important to me from the time of after having learned of being pregnant after the ways I was taken off of the JBSA military base at Fort Sam Houston, they were inaccurate in all such ways. While I admitted as to once my son and my daughter reached a certain age the shift which would occur in such reference aspects as they would always be more important to me than others, that portion thereof is what was not understood as to the facts thereof. Thus in turn while I told people my daughter would think she meant little to me she would learn as to how much she had always meant to me in more ways than I would be able to explain to her in person, just as the ways which my son would know he was and would always be important to me though would know as to the fact of him having been raised to be better than what others would think they could convince him of and he would have to tell those people as to how little they ever would be able to know of me.

He would get to the point of enraging my anger which some did not and would not realize as to what would be caused by such aspects as per the facts my son would know I had and would always care and love him, though would also know I had raised him and his sister to be better than such types of individuals I would later warn him about in the year of 2013 and later onward. However I also knew there would be whore-ish types of females who would think they would ever impress me enough to ever consider them as worthy in my sight, which would completely backfire in all such directions for them as well as any and every individual they had wished would be accepted by such choices of behaviour which I would have already explained as to what was and what was not considered as acceptable.

In turn my son would have to make decisions for himself which he would know he could contact me as I had informed him he would always be allowed to, however he would not be allowed to lie to me because I would not tolerate such choices from any such aspects thereof which he would learn and then warn others to be better people as per knowing I could not ever allow certain types of aspects to continue as I had warned him about. He as well as my daughter would learn one way or another as to how much I had and would always care and love them while hoping for the best for them, while all others would learn their place within the world as well as within my opinion thereof if ever pushed to such a level. In turn the portions of that month I had informed several others as to the situations I had been dealing with which similarly, some thought I was joking such as those within the San Marcos community regarding Tony’s house location for events. Which those people were in for a big surprise regarding their connections to my biological sister as to the ways of what they spoke about, and as to the fact I had given a kerosene lantern to Tony for a different aspect than he paid attention to even though I had told him as to what it was for. While the situations in regards as to who I learned later became his wife, the situations were inevitable as to by that point in time as to what was incorrectly allowed for such situations and events thereof referencing how such ignoring of privacy would become and all such intentions thereof would add to the negative debts that were already owed in such balances in the proverbial aspects thereof. In turn any and all recordings as to such aspects would be brought forward and in such as to the intentions as well as per the aspects of their choices for their wishes to be infamous, though their wishes were not including the hopes of which they had expressed as per they only wanted infamy and they did not care how they had gotten such infamy. In turn the aspects of be careful what you wish for, compared to know your intentions for all such aspects thereof.

Toward the end of the month a female traveled from the Dallas area who I had met through a phone call from a male named Brandon who had been in the San Antonio lifestyle who had known someone who did not believe he knew me which I spoke with her briefly on the phone over some time, not realizing there was the term of fetlebrities of which I had not been informed of as to such time. In turn the aspects as to that portion I was and am not interested in because of how I am and how I have always been regarding any such connection thereof to the portions of what I had heard about referencing those types of people who have been a problem for a longer amount of time than just since the Hollywood portions thereof, in which I would fully refuse all such portions as per the aspects as to the lack of integrity for such realties of which the command of respecting my boundaries in all such ways is and was and will always be mandatory. In turn the lack of care and lack of concern for such illegal recordings as well as illegal monitoring as well as the fact as to the aspects as to the illegal stalking would in turn lead the road to which would mean all such aspects would fully be revealed as to where the problems originated, and all such aspects as to what problems were caused needlessly to me as well would be returned in multifold as to all such individuals involved in due time. I had informed others as to the aspects as to technology of which that would be their downfall in larger ways, as I had not explained as to the portions of which I had dealt with in reference to Irving and I did not nor do I want nor need to go into such factors thereof because of the facts as to what is required for such. Since the lack of concern as to my safety has been problematic due to such illegal recordings, the facts thereof in such reference aspects as to the Irving situation for all such individuals associated with and connected to because of the facts as to transmissions. I will not save anyone who does not deserve such aspects as per their having already been told, and I do not care as to their feelings nor their opinions as to such as per the fact they were already warned as to such aspects thereof.

The fact as to the problems because of what was not paid attention to as the warnings from the documentary portion of The Exorcist by other people as well as I guesstimate other movie references as to what not to play with in reference thereof, would only lead their individual paths to where they belonged to begin with. I told others as to the requirements to get my permission as to ever being allowed to go into the locations thereof as to my Medal of Honor Art Project as having discussed the possibility of going to a location REQUIRED specific instructions which as I look back to such, none were ever informed of because none had ever asked me what was REQUIRED for such portions thereof. In turn because of such failures on all of their parts as to their choices thereof, I would not ever allow such portions to ever be in the ways others wished as per the intentions are of the most crucial aspects thereof. In turn there is not any need for me to ever give such acceptances because of the facts as to the failure to respect my Religious Freedoms as well as my other Constitutional Rights I had and have earned for myself, of which the portions thereof as to the ranking structure portions as explained in reference to the Brigadier General rank at the year of 2008 and onwards would in turn mean the facts thereof would not be of importance to me as the facts of what their choices had been would not be able to outweigh any such other aspects.

In the reference to “The Modern Day Book By: Reverend Susan MeeLing” I refuse to allow any divorce spiritually because of the facts as to what it would take for them to approach me to ask to begin with, and since none have ever actually done so as to such a request there is not the requirement for such a consideration as they cannot ask for others nor can they have others ask for them. In turn the aspects as to how the spirits would creep into their thoughts anytime they saw a color of the shade of red would instantly bring forward the memories as to what they had thought they knew better of, while the colors of orange would remind them of what I told them about my time after I woke up from my coma from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury referencing the aspects as to the after effects. The color yellow would remind them of their cowardice while the color green would remind them as to their greed wrongly, as the color blue would remind them of both the aspects of my SCUBA Diving as well as Irving, and the color purple would remind them of what I had already told them about. The color brown would remind them of how I could see, and the color black would remind them of the vastness of my comprehensions as to what they had been told what not to do. Whereas the colors have multiple meanings for myself in comparison as to far more than what I wrote here as well as what I had written in my first book “Finding A Silver Lining By: Susan MeeLing”, I did not think it took a head injury to figure out in a book just as in a movie just as online the facts of all such portions would not always be readily available to the uninitiated to such portions thereof in the ways of which the adept have the comprehensions in such portions thereof. There are those who have spent their entire lives studying scripture who still have had situations arise to the knowledge portions, of which in such aspects as to the importance of telling the truth at all times. Forgiveness is only for those who have earned it, of which I know of very few who earned such possibilities for such a consideration.

Purposely causing problems while knowing such realities in whichever ways is not the path for such ever, for any actualities of positive portions as to any such of a legacy as per the ability to see such in the more current timeframes thereof as to how certain statues and such have been once other portions had been learned. I wonder if that has to do with that Air Force laptop, and what information may have been on it.

July 2012:

As to the regards as to the 4th of July event in 2012 I have already gone over such details thereof, though additionally as to such portions as to the amount of individuals who had been in the ways of causing needless problems continuously when the situations occurred regarding those people in reference to Joseph and Megan Estes; the lack of any further concern as to the ways of which they failed to pay attention to what problems hey had caused form their over dramatic aspects, would be their full downfall in all such areas of their lives. While I had not told them about the Air Force laptop situation as to what occurred at such prior months, that was for them to learn the hard way as to what type of laptop I figured out it was that had been taken off of post. As since the year of 2014 of publishing through Amazon after registering with the Library of Congress. That meant the investigation would begin for the information to find the laptop which I knew which type thereof once I had begun to put such together. However the realities thereof would require the Congressional Investigation for the other factors which I had already explained, of which in turn when the portions of time came forward as to such a discussion I would be informed of such in the correct official context in comparison to anyone following me or any other types of wishes that would ever be. Just in the reference to my clearance, meant such full required precautions as to all such security measures. None would have the chance to ever figure out until it was too late whether forcing an individual into my life and/or taking away an individual from my life would not be the ways of such, as per protocol procedures; of which in turn it would be at the longer terms per their own detriment as to what would be no matter what additional needless aspects thereof, because of then it would be fully considered as the terminology of civilians working with other government officials as to a Prisoner of War aspect and all such individuals caught in such a web of deceit would cause their own charges for such compliances thereof as per reflecting upon the correct wording for such aspects currently in the year of 2021.

In turn the aspects of which the clearing of all such associated individuals would be required for the new orders for the world, and such portions would not be tolerated as to the aspects as to what once was a problem and would always be considered a problem to the safety of the human race in any location within the universe if their choices were to remain as such. I can hope for such betterment, though as to the situations which have occurred the hope that I have had for human beings in such regards has continued to dwindle to the point of believing there is nothing worth saving. I could be proven otherwise, though such times as to having put forward such works of mine have proven my opinion as to this moment for all such combinations as to such. I would like to hope I am incorrect as to such, though that would have to be proven. Yet all I have seen, is what I have seen regarding the situations thereof.

Either in June or July a female named Maria and I had gone to the Dallas area to get my belongings from the storage facility as I was going to evaluate what size truck I was going to need to be able to pick up my belongings, however since everything had been stolen from my storage facility regarding my belongings as per the fact Patrick Kennedy had been the only person I had given the code to in order to enter the facility in turn the only person who would be responsible for all theft of my belongings thereof; as per the fact as to which that Prairie dog male aspect as to him having been refused repeatedly, the problems thereof as to the situation regarding Irving in regards to all of the needless drama from an adult male who is biologically older. However any such changes in his behavriours had to do with his own insecurities regarding the facts of the truth as to all such portions regarding the Puffer Fish he caught, as per the fact that is a truth serum in regards to if it does not kill on impact of the puncture wounds. Thus the fact as to the ways of how he had been thereafter had shown his truthful personality traits as to his patterns of behaviour as to only being selfish and only caring about himself in comparison to ever being capable of thinking about others in ways which would not benefit him or his selfish portions thereof, and as such has proven in reference to the aspects as to the facts regarding such discussions and such in regards as to Washington state in 2019 and all such other technology connection points which prove if hypothetically as to stalking and harassing; as to the legal requirements as per him additionally having been told as to what I had dealt with in reference to my dead-ex-husband and how I refused to ever be a part of such types of problems ever again. As I had already suffered needlessly enough before I ever met that male and I did not nor do I need any such further problems thereof, as to his complaints similarly to other recreational SCUBA Divers as to my son and my daughter meaning more than the relationship factors of any type. In turn the facts if he were to have been seen or spoken with by others, the same complaints as to what I dealt with referencing his view at such times when I told him I preferred Jeff Davis over him any day of the week before ever going to Cozumel; had been problematic as per the facts thereof, because I actually respected Jeff Davis in comparison to how that male had repeatedly been told “No” just as my now dead-ex-husband had repeatedly been told no. In turn the aspects of which that male had acted as my now dead-ex-husband would have if he had been alive, only proves the facts of which in references thereof. Just as I hate my dead-ex-husband and there was not ever any type nor sort of love for that male, the same in reference thereof to that male as per having thought I was contacting who I was engaged to twice willingly in comparison to the situations as per explained.

Though I do admit I had hoped that male old come forward, I hoped for such where he was served all of the justice paperwork for him to be prosecuted for all such crimes he had committed as well as all such crimes he had perpetuated as well as all of the needless problems my minor son as well as my minor daughter as well as I had needlessly enbdured because of his problems psychologically as I guesstimate regarding having been one of those spoiled bratty children who did not like being told “No” and wished for a better outcome. I had hoped when I made the wish in reference to my Brain Coral as to bringing forth all of the justice required as to the problems I knew were all because of his ego, and I had hoped when he came before me I would be able to give all of the evidences required to bring forward the most amount of justice for others though also most importantly for myself as I recognized his type of speech as to certain individuals I dealt with when I was a child and coding in reference to Prudential as to such aspects. When he spoke on the airplane in reference to certain comments, I remembered instantly as to how much work I had done in that aspect and upon the landing I knew I had to make sure I did everything I could to bring him forward to the halls of justice to spend in front of the camera he so wanted and needed for himself; though in the ways of which were and of my preferences thereof, in comparison. I did think when later seeing his truck as to seeing such in front of my house in San Antonio at my neighbor’s house Arnold and Emily Hinjosa (?spelling?)as to the specific color of the orange truck, of which the aspects had been an odd situation regarding such aspects. If such problems had been since such times of when I had my house in San Antonio, the wrongful length of time which had been allowed as to the stalking and harassment as to such type of an individual was required to bring forward in reference to the aspects as to the ways which ironically certain key factors I had realized back in those years as to the type of individual he was. In such aspects of him bringing up the Seafood portions when I said “Duke’s Bar and Grill”, the irony of him saying he did not eat seafood had confirmed what I knew of such portions about the drama started in Austin because of not being within the area where he would see me in person though would have been hypothetically psychotic enough to cause a further rift which was not difficult to do in reference to my biological sister’s problems regarding our childhood as to the ways which our biological mother had been similar as to how such portions had been between my biological sister and I.

Since he was seemingly one of those types of people who thought he could hide behind whichever type of keyboard and not think about the facts of such portions, the additional aspects as to the problems I have had with technology devices which started to be worse after having met that individual in comparison; the facts as to Geek Squad and Best Buy being able to additionally back trace such portions thereof to the facts of such when reviewing such portions as to the current year in 2021. The lack of concern about any such safety as per not only my children as well as I had shown there was not any difference between my now dead-ex-husband and him referencing the different types of abuse, as per him bringing up #McAllen #McAllenTX #McAllenTexas McAllen and who I had been engaged to twice willingly in comparison to as he knew I did not want to have anything to do with him ever; meant in reference to a letter I had delivered to an office in Austin about who I had been engaged to, the multiple aspects as to such portions thereof due to the electrocution I was dealing with while in Washington state as well as currently now as per choosing to go with the type of location to show such portions were not faked in regards to Washington state as to the levels of which I knew somehow my headaches and migraines would show the proof thereof as per the amount or lack thereof that I would be willing to step outside of my apartment to go anywhere as to the levels of which in the reference aspects as to the portions of what I dealt with in Washington state as to the problems with electronics as to the Best Buy. As the apartment complex has had several times a different apartment building have the electronics of the fire alarms to go off, I have fully proven my point as to such reasons I had required the transfer to begin with as per the issues thereof to the electrical portions of which I had already gone over in reference to multiple explanations.

In turn the aspects of the facts of such which no one in the state of Texas or other locations had believed me about, I chose to put myself into a location which had as much electronics as possible to prove such points thereof in full lack of concern or care for the facts of which some had wished were a different aspect as to the realities regarding Geek Squad as well as other such portions regarding technology devices. Though the facts as to the microwave and the refrigerator portions in the old apartment were enough to actually show such portions of my issues with technology as to the electrical portions, I knew there would be those who failed to see such as the reality as per only one apartment. In turn because of the additional aspects as to the water line breaks only being considered as a coinky dink to others, I figured in addition to other such regards of what was required to additionally prove what people in Washington state had noticed referencing such situations; as to making sure the full clarifications thereof were able to be seen in full, as per the realities of knowing that and other individuals have been stalking me and harassing me needlessly. Of which instead of those people ever having the wherewithal to pay attention correctly as to the wrongful situations of such types of people and their behaviours which needed to be shown as to how atrocious they actually were for allowing themselves to choose to believe their lies from their games, I knew the only way to prove their games were worthless compared to human life was to go to the levels of using my Blue Identification Card of/for the Armed Forces of the United States of America to prove such additional points until it was fully correctly confirmed as to the realities thereof being accepted in full as the proof would only be when the full acknowledgements as to what I had earned on my own were fully brought forward and recognized officially in such ways so that truthful justice could actually occur.

While not the most conventional ways as per the irony of the microwave aspects as to having given the information during the walk through when finally able to transfer, additionally such portions show the aspects to The Lodge at Madrona apartment complex as to what their company and their staff had chosen to push forward with their choices to ignore wrongly my heath; which it should not take a head injury to figure out as to who I am when my health needs specific things taken care of and is actually made to be better, so too does the world do and be better. Thus those people in reference to the apartment complex additionally to the pictures from when at the Lodge at Madrona regarding the sink area first, then the water pipes to the Carrington Oaks as to the microwave and the other appliances with the sink portions thereof in conjunction to the water lines and those aspects throughout the state of Texas for such references as to the lack of belief in me; and the ways of how other such portions have taken me from the month of December in the year of 2000 as to my Blue Identification card of/for the Armed Forces of the United States of America because my now dead-ex-husband was not allowed to have his own and was my dependent as to such portions, the repeating as to the additional aspects to the proof of the Prisoner of War aspects as to me on the soil of the United States of America of which since the reports online regarding the aspects as to my website in conjunction with my books registered with the Library of Congress as well as sent to for such reviewals, I wonder what it actually takes for people to actually realize the situations thereof to the problems which had been brought forward. My lack of faith in human beings has only progressed in comparison to what I once had believed and hoped in regards of while having fought to keep such individuals and lands safe, of which in such regards as to various veterans and Active Duty/National Guard/Reservists who have reported such situations in varying combinations thereof, what has taken the law enforcement aspects so long as to actually step forward to step in to actually help in comparison? I literally drove out to the Walter Reed area to speak with them about a multitude of situations though because of the murmering in my apartment as well as what minimal I pus online, I suppose the assumptions as to wishing there was everything known in comparison to actually learning from the recent past as to the problems of such types of egos thinking that when stalking someone they could ever know fully.

Thus the problems to which why bother going forward with the US Space Force if the human population is going to continue to be in such ways, as what is there to protect at such points when thinking about such aspects? Life? I am the life, which in turn if that aspect is not actually taken care of properly then what is the point of life to being with? In such realities thereof, the lack of concern and the lack of regard for life has only been shown in all such regards and references thereof as per the aspects shown by the intentions and the choices thereof. I chose to take the aspects as to what I had refused and use such for myself instead of allowing another in reference to thew portions of that male at that Geek Squad who had refused to accept I did not want r need to be a part of any such research as I denied that fully, which in turn I chose to research on my own by my own accord to then prove such hypothetical portions as to what I had already told others not to mess with and what not to cause any further problems to. Since those within the state of Texas had chosen the ways they had chosen while I was there after I returned after how I wound up in Washington state, I took their situations to show them as to what I actually had accomplished while they had tortured me in such references as to how I wound up in Washington state. They did not care about such portions as to my well being which in turn impacts the earth as well as their well being, then why should I care about such in the references as per their lack of faith in my truth? I chose to deal with such and despite the wishes as to override such aspects, there is not the legal portions in their favor though solely in my favor as per having to prove the facts of what I was dealing with in reference to the zapping I had told others I was dealing with in reference to the situations currently; pun intended.

While I still have other things I need to take care of in reference to my transfer out to where I have needed to be at the tip of the spear for, my personal choices as to prove such aspects in ways which do not impact others the ways which they had thought though impact in every way possible whether good or bad as to whether I am in a good mood or a bad mood additionally are proven in reference to the technology portions thereof as to my needing to work on keeping myself calm and the uprising in reference to the alarms thereof as well as the water pipelines. In turn when such aspects were fought against by the facts as to trying to withhold the aspects of the legal requirements to inform a renter of the legal transfer portions as per the facts of such hypothetical stalking problems able to be proven additionally as per when the transfer went through, I have proven such accounts thereof in full for all such who have been guilty for as long as they have been guilty as per the situations of whatever they chose to complain about as to whoever they spoke with and whatever messages and postings online and/or near an electronic device. In turn while I would guess when it was revealed which apartment complex of my choice as to such the fight against was because they already knew subconsciously that I had been correct the entire time, though they had wished otherwise and had wished if I chose a different location such games would continue in comparison to stopping all gaming portions no matter what the cost to them as per their choices to play their games is their fees to pay in full.

Thus in such regards when I feel like going somewhere, I feel like going somewhere. All role playing must end, just as all games and types thereof must end as well. The wish for putting the term gaming in reference to going on the internet is incorrect as per the wishes thereof, as per the transmissions which have already been watched and seen over the decades as to the first online portions thereof. In turn if the male I went on a couple of dates with named Lawrence Huebner had failed to ever think about speaking with me about such in person in comparison to what a private security individual who oversteps such boundaries as per the knowledge thereof to such types of people in regards of in the discussion I had on the phone with my ex-sister-in-law about his penis, that was his fault all of these years as to not ever thinking to actually speak with me in person about such aspects thereof and his fault for assuming in whatever ways hypothetically had been assumed. In all such regards as to that needless stalking and needless harassment that I have dealt with on top of everything else, what is ever good enough for people to ever get over their own egos for such portions of to actually make the correct choice in comparison to furthering what they have already learned does not work? How many years is it from November 2009 through to this month in 2021 for such to not have ever figured such out in person was the only way to ever get such answers with the direct questions asked instead of how such had gone, or does that take a head injury to figure that out? That does not show concern by the way, as concern in my opinion is when in person in reference to relationship aspects as per the fact as to technology has distanced people as to the actualities thereof because of wishing people were easier to realize in such comparisons thereof. While some aspects yes, other aspects are nowhere close to such as I would guesstimate this particular posting in my journal blog entry fully proves such aspects thereof.

Where I feel like going, I will go where I feel like going. I am who I am and any such restrictions wrongly, are only furthered proof that the various levels of the United States of America have been informed as to such and stood by doing nothing to actually help the situations thereof while claiming they are further along in such viewpoints as per the Democratic Party aspects thereof. In turn with the portions of the constant issues in reference to the continuous work thereof, if I am accurate such qualifies as to the anti-slavery laws of which the United States of America had supposedly ended when the end of the Civil War occurred in the 1800s.

In turn the ways of such situations despite the problems which have needlessly been such situations thereof,

What does it matter, in the reality though? I still have dealt with what I have dealt with, and I still have not ever gotten justice for what I have dealt with. I have not ever been able to actually have what is required for what is for my best interests up to such points, and the only time I have ever had any consecutive good days are a total of 6 days when I was in Florida which I cannot stand the thought of the state because of how such situations had gone thereafter. While I was told the assumption to me going to #FL #Florida #Floridastate Florida in reference to what occurred in reference to my daughter as to moving out there were accurate as to not being able to handle such, it was not due to the fact of that only being the one place which I ever had a good set of memories with my children and I as a family. It had everything to do with the fact of how many people I knew would be from where I grew up after being born and raised in the area of the northeast coast, and I hate assumptions just as I hate stolen valor of each and every type.

I had earned my respect from the oceanic waters and the beings thereof, in comparison to any other human being on the earth. If such a ceremony occurred in reference to any other having wrongly been given the credit for what I had earned on my own, then you have to deal with the facts thereof that you insulted all of the beings within the oceanic waters as well as within the space aspects thereof for the past several years just as you have to deal with how they respond to each aspect which upsets me; for I have always said it is better when I am in a good mood than a bad mood, and it should not have to take a head injury to figure out the water element is connected to emotional responses. Thus anytime my pain levels are elevated as to any aspect thereof whether emotional or not as it has been proven, when pain levels increase so too does stress levels increase. In that reference as to such that means the aspects of the impact within the waters thereof increase in picking up on my emotions and whether you believe it or not, the realities of such portions can be seen in the fact the ice glaciers re actually the same size; it is just the more about of water within the areas which push upward through to break the ice glaciers because of the compacted-ness. Every tear that one of those creatures cries at the bottom of the ocean for what I have been dealing with, adds thousands of gallons to the ocean water levels.

What does that matter, to anyone referencing the United States of America or anywhere else in the world? Well the compaction of the land masses is one portion, the water flow to the underground caverns and caves is another aspect, just as the pressure onto the land as to the water pipes is another factor thereof to take into consideration. The geological reformations as to the depth levels as to waters such as in regards of lakes turn into ponds, and rivers dry up because of the fact of such movement within the lands to move upward; ion which the fact as to the scientific portions as to the lower the levels of water though the higher the levels of the ground means the evaporation rates as to higher temperature locations makes such waters disappear as to the example of the San Gabriel river among other locations. Thus I thought such mattered before I wound up in Washington state, though I suppose none others had paid attention to the facts thereof and what preferred to keep wishing on things that were not what had been for the best interests of anyone in the realistic portions thereof as to the amount of damages caused by that hypothetical ceremony as per the transmissions thereof. In turn each second of each minute of each hour of each day of each week of each month of each year that has gone by since my first return to land after I accomplished such all the way onward until such a correction by such officials in the fullest formats thereof, the lack of concern those beings have for anyone on land because of the treatments they know I have been dealing with as well as the lack thereof in regards of.

I suppose I can sarcastically make a joke about the #GulfofMexico Gulf of Mexico, in several references over the years as to such hypotheticals in regards of oil.

August 2012:

In the problems which occurred after the 4th of July event, I changed my name on fetlife because of the additional amount of threats I had been dealing with and as I had written about in “Finding A Silver Lining By: Susan MeeLing”, “Finding The Silver Lining By: Susan MeeLing”, and “The Modern Day Book By: Reverend Susan MeeLing”; there had been minimal if any concern as to any such portions as to what I had brought up in discussions in person, about anything regarding my safety or my best interests as to those I once knew as per the lack of concern shown as to how such discussions had been. While it may have either been in August or September as to the month thereof, I had changed my name on fetlife thinking that would stop the harassment I was dealing with as well as stopping the threats which came through which several individuals had seen in person such as Alicia and she had told Erica about the realities thereof. Instead of anyone who should have paid attention back then as to what I had told them what I was dealing with, instead when I wound up in Washington state and anyone ever speaking with me in truth about realizing such from reading my book sand/or my website; in comparison the most easy and simple of ways to ever actually speak with me, had completely been avoided in comparison by their choices if accurate as to such as per my reflections when looking back to such times as per “The Modern Day Book By: Reverend Susan MeeLing”.

I went through hell and back and not one individual actually paid attention in the correct ways nor had done what was required or needed at such times until after having to write about such and even then, what good has that done when there has not been any worthwhile of the in person discussions in person in truth on the other side thereof? I can only speak in truth and thus those who have known about my website and/or my work which have had to wait for me to explain such, that is considered as a lie in such references as viewed to me as well as a lie considered by such beings thereof. I did not think it took a head injury to figure that out as to such portions as that being considered as a needless game on others’ choices for such reference aspects, as the same in reference to my books which were illegally released without my permission as to such aspects. In the regards as to the facts of such having purposefully been put into the specific genres as required by law as to such genres, the fact of such childish garbage from whomever made such a choice without my consent is not any different than how my now dead-ex-husband was when he was alive though ironically goes against what he had wanted for me in all such ways as to what the situations were when he realized all of the damages he needlessly caused my son and my daughter and I./ The irony of such confessions as well as actually genuine heartfelt apologies as to what he knew was incorrect and wrongful choices thereof in comparison to what has and has not occurred, is nothing new to what I have already dealt with. That does not mean I or anyone who has survived such portions should ever be forced to go through again and again, it means those people who have known about such should actually assist in the proper ways thereof.

Then again, I look as I do in comparison to those who look more normal comparatively as I have been told. I hate the way I look because of the reasons as to why I look as I do and the lack of respect as to such portions is again, nothing new to me. I dealt with such regarding my biological mother/sister/father as well as my now dead-ex-husband as even though he had tattoos he hated the fact I had gotten tattoos to help myself do better an then apologized for the facts thereof as he saw how much they had actually helped me in comparison to what had been assumed by others. Thus when in San Antonio in 2012 in August/September timeframe while I was doing the best I could for my son and my daughter and I, where was anyone that actually was capable if doing what was needed for such assistance? Oh, I look as I do and because of such assumptions to the adult consenting lifestyle as to such portions. While not forgetting how those who were in the Dominant Mentor Program had thought it would be a funny game to play as to my work in regards of my life and had absolutely no regard for anything outside of their little bubble of a world, refused to see at those times how each aspect was capable of impacting them in a multitude of ways in various aspects and without me there would not be the adult consenting lifestyle in any such ways if I had ever walked away just once.

I knew in Washington state it only would take one time for me to not be involved with the adult consenting lifestyle for all areas throughout to begin to crumble and fall down as to any and all aspects thereof, and officially I had walked away in reference to the year of 2019 when no longer attending any events. In turn my choice as to where I preferred to go for what I felt comfortable with at such times in reference to Club Sapphire if there were those who wished they knew me better and had gotten involved in comparison to simply just letting me be myself and stick their noses in their own business in comparison to sticking their noses in mine, the facts thereof as to the online portions as well as the in person portions of such would not have gone the ways such has. As I know now in the year of 2021 as to the facts of which without my choice of being involved with such the ways of which it will go one way or the other, there is not any need for me to do so whether or not some pai attention to the fact I had only been involved with the adult consenting lifestyle as a balance to when I had my son and my daughter as to being able to have the adult discussions in comparison to having to take care of the responsibilities as I had at such times. Thus in turn the portions of not ever needing to be involved is the reality of such portions which those people I had told were the reasons I had gotten involved with the adult lifestyle to begin with at such times in the year of 2004, though discussed other times as well as per the larger involvement thereof. In such regards as to having known such portions for the aspects as to other adult portions and other adults’ mental clarity in such references, the requirement as to the balance for myself is no longer the same and the lack of the need for me to be involved with such portions because of the fact of such balancing portions are no longer the same.

In turn when I wound up in Washington state and had fought to keep such going despite the pain levels from the zapping I dealt with during such times as I explained repeatedly before I went to Club Sapphire because of how those situations went at Crystal Creek apartment complex in #Vancouver #VancouverWA #VancouverWashington Vancouver, the facts as to whether or not such continues only relies on my shoulders of which I personally do not care for such portions in the realistic aspects after all such portions of which have occurred and the justice portions thereof required for myself. If I am inaccurate then the lifestyle will not have dwindled and there would not have been any problems anywhere else after I had wound up in Washington state, in every individual state within the United States of America in comparison to only those who would think of just in the state of Texas; l compared to the larger portions of the United States of America, in each of the 50 states and possibly within the various nations thereof when looking back to such a reflection of time; as I told people the adult consenting lifestyle is not a place to play games unless fully consented through in person discussions as well as the possible online or in writing portions thereof, however to assume as to other aspects just because of being on a website or just because of writing something does not ever bring forward nor mean any form of consent as to such aspects of whatever was written about in the fiction format regarding books/movies and the same in reference to having such knowledge as to the aspects of others’ work.

Thus I guesstimate when reflecting in the year of 2021 as to August 2012, the situations thereof as to what I figured out in Washington state in the year of 2013; would only be the beginning portions as to the end of the facts wished for compared to the actual facts, as opinions in comparison to facts are different as wishes are opinions and facts are facts in truth. I also guesstimate there are those who learned the hard way as to what I had told people I had noticed with certain songs on the radio as well as had noticed about in reference to the 50 Shades series of books, as to the wishes of those types of people who did not see the difference between such portions as to human beings compared to characters in a book and/or music portions because of a female singing such lyrics such as #Rhianna Rhianna despite the fact #Ludacris Ludacris had sung lyrics in other songs as to such preferences for himself. However the portions of the ways to which some had not paid attention to the lyrics only because of the voice a to the sound of and/or in reference to the aspects as to books and the differences of fact compared to fiction, as to the realities I had told people in person as well as wrote about online regarding such aspects thereof.

September 2012:

Having to focus on much more as the intensities grew regarding the situations boiling over soon in such times, the facts of which fewer and fewer came to speak with me as well as the fewer as to who spoke with me in different aspects; began a different turn of events to which the further portions of my lack of interest being involved with the adult consenting lifestyle as per the ostracizing portions thereof, only pushed me further away from any individual in the slightest regards. When I make an effort and such is ignored and/or thought of in different ways then intended as per, I simply begin to withdraw and there is minimal need to step outward any further when I get to a certain point in my opinion as per my personal comfort levels and requirements thereof. When I get to the level of which in regards as to Washington state in 2019, that is when the certainty of such portions begins the downward decline in ways which for others to deal with such aspects they had chosen to ignore the realities thereof occur as such had been in reference to when I was growing up in New Jersey and the tristate area for certain aspects as seen especially in reference to after having been moved to Illinois in 1998. What I choose to focus on is what prospers as I had realized long ago, however when my credit is due and those portions are denied wrongly then the factors as to such portions are as they go for such aspects thereof. Thus when the realities of my accomplishments have been ignored in such prior times to my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury, you are able to see how such declines have gone over the courses of time regarding my involvements thereof. Those who had caused harm needlessly to my son and my daughter and I during the point within SCUBA Diving was the largest mistake for such individuals to make, as per the facts as to what could have been taught to both as well as others within their age ranges. While I had gotten my son involved with the SCUBA Diving of Junior Seals, that was not going to be the same as if I had taught both my son and my daughter along the ways thereof to then get into SCUBA Diving.

In turn the ways of such dwindling because of the additional portions as to such recreational SCUBA Divers wrongly playing games and being concerned with what they had no rights to in any such ways, the facts of such portions are able to be seen in several references thereof. The longer such has continued the worse such has gotten for all such aspects as I guesstimate at this point has been able to be seen in such references, as per having been working on teaching my son and my daughter about the work I had put into such aspects and the achievements which could be if actually having put the effort into such as well as the rewards from such accomplishments. However since such had not ever been recognized, that aspects has caused the additional problems to my son and my daughter on top of the other portions thereof because of having told them about such aspects in person when in my house in Carrollton in the year of 2009. Thus the longer such takes as to others bringing such forward with the facts of in comparison to just myself, only means the dwindling of children as well as per the facts as seen regarding the ways which family units have gone over the years whether as a single parent and/or as a family unit. In turn the realities of such portions are factually able to be proven over the course of time to which while some have wished to say otherwise, the proof of such aspects between the years of 2009 through to now in 2021 are able to be seen in such references as to the states thereof. I have written about the importances of while also having described in discussions of such realities as to, though several had wished they knew better and/or otherwise in comparison. Thus the healthier and the better my son, my daughter, and I are the same in reverberations to the energetic portions to other such aspects thereof in the multitude of ways.

When I wrote about having sealed my son and my daughter in reference to healing energy portions which is an irony in reference to #LDS #Mormon #AngelMoroni #ChurchofJesusChristofLatterDaySaints #JesusChrist Angel Moroni’s Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints as to learning of such portions regarding the aspects thereof later in 2019, it is an additional irony as to the aspects as to a song I heard years ago by Train called “Drops of Jupiter” as to a few oddities thereof in the lyrics I have enjoyed and the ironies thereof to the lyrics themselves. Lyrics from Genius #Genius:

[Verse 1]

Now that she's back in the atmosphere

With drops of Jupiter in her hair

She acts like summer and walks like rain

Reminds me that there's a time to change, hey

Since the return of her stay on the moon

She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey

Hey, hey-yeah

[Chorus]

But tell me, did you sail across the sun?

Did you make it to the Milky Way

To see the lights all faded

And that heaven is overrated?

And tell me, did you fall from a shooting star?

One without a permanent scar

And did you miss me while you were

Looking for yourself out there?

[Verse 2]

Now that she's back from that soul vacation

Tracing her way through the constellation, hey, mmm

She checks out Mozart while she does Tae-Bo

Reminds me that there's room to grow, hey, yeah

Now that she's back in the atmosphere

I'm afraid that she might think of me as

Plain ol' Jane told a story about a man

Who was too afraid to fly so he never did land

[Chorus]

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet?

Did you finally get the chance

To dance along the light of day

And head back to the Milky Way?

And tell me, did Venus blow your mind?

Was it everything you wanted to find?

And did you miss me while you were

Looking for yourself out there?

[Bridge]

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken

Your best friend always sticking up for you

Even when I know you're wrong?

Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance

Five-hour phone conversation

The best soy latte that you ever had, and me?

[Chorus]

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet? (Feet)

Did you finally get the chance

To dance along the light of day (Light of day)

And head back toward the Milky Way?

And tell me, did you sail across the sun?

Did you make it to the Milky Way

To see the lights all faded

And that heaven is overrated?

Tell me, did you fall from a shooting star?

One without a permanent scar

And did you miss me while you were

Looking for yourself?

In turn the only way to turn such around is the revelations thereof by not only myself, though by all such measures thereof through others having willingly speaking the truth and putting such truths out there in the references as to my personal works and my personal influencing of such realities; of which can be noticed additionally in the failures and collapses in the metaphor of roads and bridges of structures which were considered as safe in comparison to the accidents which occurred over the aspects thereof of such times especially in Washington state for such aspects and along the west coast for all of those who knew better though instead made the choices they had made in comparison.

Thus if you want to fix and repair such portions, then the truth must be revealed as to such. The only way to heal to fix and repair such aspects, is with the truth.

You cannot go to a doctor and lie about the symptoms to then expect any type of help, thus what would the difference be in reference to such aspects thereof? Did you people not learn from my now dead-ex-husband as to him lying to the doctors at Fort Sam Houston about using the facts from my after effects from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury regarding all of the prescriptions he was taking which were some of the ones I had been prescribed at the same time as well as throughout the years prior, as to such truths thereof? His death was because he lied to the doctors as he thought he knew better about the after effects from my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury just from watching me go through what I was dealing with at those times and when he chose to take all of those prescriptions he did not need, those were too many for his system to handle or deal with because of the lack of the need and the lack of the requirement for such portions involved. In turn with the additional portions as to his choice to steal valor and wear a uniform he had not earned inside of the city of San Antonio, meant he additionally brought on needless portions to himself for all such garbage aspects as to wishing that would ever be acceptable enough; which in the end, he is in the ground and there are those who wish it to be the other way around. However the facts of which he would have allowed everyone to suffer in the exact ways of which I had worked to assist to prevent in comparison, which at this point the choice is yours.

Do you prefer the same path he took quickly, or do you prefer ca longer and healthier life? Personally, I prefer a longer and healthier life though I am uncertain as to whether or not others truly want such or need such for themselves by such choices and decisions over the years as to what has occurred and gone one.

Since there have been those who have continued needless drama of which is unhealthy and is what my now dead-ex-husband had preferred while he was alive as per stirring of the proverbial pot the ways which Ana and Matt had preferred in such times, the choices of which those people have made their choices in comparison to what is actually correct is what each individual has to choose for themselves in comparison thereof. Life is not a game, nor is love; despite any such songs or fiction style books, as those aspects are not to be toyed with and not to be messed with in the negative.

October 2012:

I went to take care of what I could as per the usual thereof despite the problems having continued onward, of which the portion in which Irving had fully come forward as to what I needed to do on my own referencing removing the last piece of what was in regards of when I had landed at the bottom of the ocean and surfaced alive from. The ways of which I had seen from such times had been if I had been given back the vials of what was in my SCUBA Diving bag which are not a metaphor for my pictures or my SCUBA Diving log book for clarifications, those portions showing up meant that when the last portion in my leg had to be removed by my hands meant I was going to deal with a few more aspects until the rest of the population on the land would make their choices. The only way to describe the physical pain of having to pull such out on my own is the ways of which in an twisted irony, of realizing how many people I had actually lost in reference to the attacks in 1993 plus the attacks in regards of 11 September 2001 as to the amount of people who I had known in person during the years of when I was growing up within the tristate area as to having to be able to give a metaphor to the aspects of either remembering their face or remembering their name though not necessarily both for such aspects as to the physical pain levels for having to pull such out from my own leg. As per the size as well as the spines from the piece without ripping anything in my own leg as to the way it had been entangled. In reference to the number of people, I would guesstimate the way pictures have pixilation as to the various blocks to make the different areas able to be seen in a high resolution raw picture with the physical as close to the aspects as to the same leg as to the physical view as to the vine tattoo as to what had to be removed from that leg at a macro level for such a size to the piece of my leg where I took the picture from for the portions to be seen as I could see it within my skin before I was able to take it out of me. However for those who cannot envision such, just think of the realities of my Phoenix tattoo area as to the number of times I had work done to complete that particular overall, though condense the situations into a less than 5-10 minute point in time for the physical pain for a smaller example thereof.

Line up each individual in front of my son, my daughter, and I who is negligent to what occurred regarding us with the proof thereof gone over; and I would have not one problem taking them out in front of every individual on any recording device in person regarding a tribunal, while looking directly into their eyes. This, I promise. Though being able to draw out their life force to absorb to be able to enrich myself is also a fully different aspect as to the time of reading this they will notices their age levels of the physical aspects as the portions of which the irreversible aspects of the portions to renew and regenerate the fuller life portions for myself as to each aspect thereof which had been caused needlessly, of which while their aging faster and their inability to get such back in any ways to my ability to draw such out for my consumption and my usages for my betterment and my overall general health for the healing as well as the realities of the younger and younger I physically look as well as younger and younger I am able to feel as such are ways of more benefit for myself as to the length of time for which such and occur and will continue to occur for my health and my wellbeing as well as my youthful physical in all ways as to my youth.

The wrinkles which could have been or could be are transferred to them and their bodies whereas the lack of any wrinkles as much as possible for myself, the more elastic skin for myself comparatively to them, the more about of etcetera regarding all such health benefits for such times until the portions of which either they remain as lifeless on whichever floor thereof or the acknowledgement in all such truths for myself and what I accomplished in full. The white and or gray hair to their heads in comparison to the lack of white and gray hair as well as the rich and thick hair to my hair compared to the weakening of their hair follicles, are only a few examples which such can review the amount of stress levels and the normal aging processes thereof compared to the ways I am as to this year in 2021. Thus justice occurs one way or another, either way I get my justice and I get what is mine for my health; though I prefer other aspects in comparison to removing time from those people’s clocks, as that does not return to them ever though fully remains mine for my benefits and betterments.

Such absorptions for me to be able to maintain and sustain myself as best as I can are just a few realities as to what occurred when I had to pull that out of my leg, as was explained to me for a smaller aspect thereof. Of which the aspects which are mine and remain as mine are for all of time, as to each individual in reference to the SCUBA Diving aspect as to such problems caused by those who had refused to acknowledge such over the years though stole from me; in return such was given to me for the aspects of my maintenance as per their choices, and continues onward as such does for the aspects of which my youth remains for many reasons and many purposes permanently. By all accounts what I dealt with for such years from 2009 through to currently I should look as Richard Thomas though because of such realities if there is the hypotheticals thereof of such truths as to any problems from that male and/or his associations, my youth is my youth permanently and I have as I have seen in other ways looked younger than those who have dealt with a smaller amount of overall stress portions thereof. In turn, karma is karma for such greed hypotheticals as per a small gift in return as to the ways of which such should have correctly been taken care of via the morals and the ethics which should have been natural realistically. In addition to other portions of such aspects, I would guesstimate the youthfulness of my view to such portions thereof regarding those particulars; additionally shows it is always better to tell the truth, than to ever think to lie.

November 2012 through to August 2013:

At the point in time of having to remove such from my leg, the physical pain was at such intensities as to how much it physically caused the pain levels it had as well as the healing required for such aspects regarding the vials I had drank to do what needed to the additional boosts of energetic healing in different ways beyond the quantum additional aspects thereof the combinations of such times have been a blur in a multitude of ways because of such aspects as to the pain levels having pushed past anything I had ever felt before in my life. When I had the vision regarding the unzipping of in regards to what I had written about in “Finding A Silver Lining By: Susan MeeLing”, that was less painful to feel at that time for that vision than what I felt from the residual aspects as to having to pull that stem out from my leg compared to other such portions thereof. I would not hope for that pain for anyone, despite the rage and anger I have felt over such years of my life. To then at a point deal with the cauterizing while dealing with the zapping in reference to the ironic portions as to Washington state though more specifically being above the Mason Dixon Line in an area I did not think would be ideal for me in the year of 2013 onward to the year of 2019, before returning to the state of Texas in that year as things had gone as they had gone. The aspects as to being truthful while keeping in mind, heart, body, and soul the 10 Commandments is of importance whether some believed.

…

While in the ways of which those who had been passed away in regards of the amount of people in reference to the attacks on 11 September 2001 at this countdown on the 4th day to the 20 year memorial, the twisted portions as to the times thereof in conjunction to situations in many ways because I knew more about a variety of situations more concentrated to the areas during the time of before I had my Psalm Sunday 2000 head injury and woke up from my coma as per the facts of which the many I knew, I am in an odd way glad they did not have to see such aspects as to the ways which situations had gone despite how much it hurts to actually have to admit the facts thereof. Those who knew people who had passed away and/or were lost have a positive memory of them in whichever ways and as those who have lived and/or were born and raised within the tristate areas especially in reference to the decades of the 1980s and the 1990s know how much life filled the streets thereof though also knew of some of the darker aspects, of which I would guesstimate the facts as to they were doing what they loved and enjoyed means a bit more at this point in time than when I had ever first been heard to say such and/or was read. Those who knew such people and know how the area was know they would have wanted better than what occurred if they were able to take a look back in such regards thereof, which in turn the aspects as to being thankful for the lessons learned to be able to grow and come back stronger in a multitude of ways.

The Sycamore trees may have been changed over to cedar though the cedar is able to assist in certain aspects, the sycamore has the longest amount of life comparatively for which brings forth the ability to bring shelter for the smaller ones while providing a bit of shaded rest for the weary to regain the strength to continue onward in which aspects as best as possible. While cedar is easier to cover more ground in smaller groves however they also tend to burn quicker with more smoke and the life brought forward is quite different than the sycamore which the life thereof does not burn, though strengthens other portions within itself and its branches to be able to maintain the strong roots from whence it had first begun to bring forward the seeds to create the life for other such types to be able to grow and flourish. People do not go to forests to see cedar trees though they do make the travels for a forest full of Sycamore trees and/or redwoods, which have certain similar aspects as to the botanical portions of growth as well as life production for future generations while maintaining and sustaining the roots of the past for the current times and onward celebrating as life goes on for a better and a brighter future in the multitude of ways.

Those who I once knew were a forest of sycamores to me as a child and as a teenager and though because of only the aspects of not remembering all of their names and/or faces in the aspects thereof, over the time of these past 20 years as to see certain portions as to them remaining as Sycamores for those who once knew them as to others seeing in the ways of them having been cedars; of which the irony of such aspects to such others seeing them as cedars, when they may have qualities and traits thereof to those who they had viewed as cedars which means the aspects thereof to such cedar proverbial references when those people remain Sycamores for far more and for far longer throughout time in each aspect of positivity to make better ways from the lessons learned from the situations thereof for the betterment for more to sprout upwards to spread their branches as to the ways thereof as per the originality as well as the facts as to the original 13 colony areas.

Whereas I can either remember the faces though not the names or the names and not their faces, I know there are those who are able to remember both the names as well as their faces whether or not they were able to be found; though such aspects of consideration for the census portion to be able to review the percentages of growth and such from the times thereof, to be able to give a closer estimation as to the actual numbers of people who were in those times regarding 11 September 2001 as per the fluctuation of the more generalized portions for the overall aspects as to the demographics thereof from such portions as New York City and such surrounding areas types of travel as well as similarly to the area involving the Pentagon, does not change because of the ways of the specific layouts of the streets as well as the plumbing and such electrical pipelines for the considerations thereof in a major way as per the aspects of how such portions would have been thought to fall though had not taken into consideration the materials as well as the wind resistant additional strength portions for those types of structures which would not have been within most of the blueprints because of the complexities as to the ensuring of the safety aspects as to which hypothetical governmental portions thereof could have been within the buildings and the towers as to the security aspects thereof; since I have heard about certain individuals who have thought of other aspects regarding what known materials at such times, in comparison to the years of which the World Trade Center had actually been built in such comparison aspects additionally to the additions for the construction portions thereof.

If looking at the child game of #Jenga Jenga, the aspects as to the way which the Twin Towers fell is actually on the mark as to the ways the situations occurred for the most part for the size thereof in a comparison portion though possibly because of the ways the blocks are crossed as to not seeing the similarities regarding such. Though it is not hidden as to what I had been told as to what my biological mother had known in reference to people within the Twin Towers who had practiced various types of drills which once had worked for Prudential who had been able to escape the towers and safely get out to go hide and take cover, that is a part of insurance realities as to knowing such portions when taking a look into the situations thereof as that is part of what is looked into as per insurance aspects and as close as the World Trade Center location in to airports it truthfully makes sense as many times some people have taken their private jets to whiz by the areas especially in the 1980s and the 1990s as per other problems that were occurring when some wanted to make a point known in such references.

As on land some people have similarly done so and thus the realities regarding the towers had been more well known to those who looked upward from the ground in comparison to only looking one way, of which I know I remember seeing certain private airplanes as well as helicopters get seemingly close to the towers before in those years and why certain #TSA TSA regulations had to be put into place with more heavy restrictions because of the situations thereof. Similarly to how model airplanes have had to have insurance as well as guidelines the same can be seen in reference to those who have gotten involved with the flying of drones, of which the backwards view into such times is able to be noticed regarding such portions thereof to take into such considerations as to the #FAA FAA and other such agencies.